PistolPete 61421 Report post Posted April 25, 2014 Should be allowed back in general discussion area, it gives ALL clients a opportunity to read about important issues within this industry and getting an insight from ALL providers on different issues. It is not advertising, it is issues within the industry. Just saying ;) BTW great article SexyLacy. 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kmwq 5477 Report post Posted April 25, 2014 Thanks, I wasn't able to cross off all the do's but now I know! I can't wait to put all of it into practice. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CristyCurves 169032 Report post Posted April 25, 2014 My checklist- honesty-you expect it so please give it. punctuality- I am, so please be. discretion-I give it, protect it, so please show me the same . Respect- not just when we are together, but continue to after we part, I will. I think the rest has been covered;) 7 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bcguy42 38594 Report post Posted April 25, 2014 SexyLacy, Emily J, and Christycurves... together you have pretty much summed up all a man needs to know to enter into and fully appreciate the interactions between himself and his chosen partner. We, the gentlemen, should all aspire to be the "Mr Wonderful" Lara described in her blog. Thank you Lacy for launching this thread and thank you Emily J for contributing such an excellent find in the blogpost. 7 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Exotic Touch Danielle 31729 Report post Posted April 25, 2014 A good client to me would be: Please be on time as you would expect me to be(if for whatever reason you cannot make the appointment please give notice for cancellation...Life happens and I truely do understand that) Good hygiene is a must(I always take a shower and brush my teeth before the appointment please do the same...if you need to take a shower you are more than welcome to at my place) Respect!(The upmost important thing on my list) please put the donation in an envelope and place on table before the appointment Good communication and positive vibes always! 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mrgreen760 37785 Report post Posted April 25, 2014 In the end it's all just common sense. Peace MG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Regent 35404 Report post Posted April 25, 2014 As a fetish companion, much of what makes a good client is the same as for any other service provider, but I do have some different criteria as well. Good clients read my website and include all the information I request in our initial contact. They know what they want and communicate clearly, so I have to do minimal clarification and we can keep our pre-session communication quick and succinct. I want a straight, to the point discussion about specific activities and vibe, since much of what I do is fulfilling very specific fantasies. Punctuality, hygiene, gracefully managing the money and being generally respectful are all important. In person, before we get started, they easily get on the same page with me as far as my in session expectations around communication, safewords and my limits. They honestly answer my questions about health conditions that might cause issues with some activities and what their limits are. In session, my best clients are responsive and communicative. Their body language and noises tell me that they're enjoying themselves. They communicate verbally about what feels good, what hurts too much, if they want more or less. They don't expect me to read their minds, and they understand that even if they're submissive, a hot scene is a collaborative effort, and they can't be a completely passive actor. They have realistic expectations for the session and understand that things may not go exactly the way they do in their fantasies, and that's no ones fault, it's just reality. They're honest about their focus and intention - if they tell me they want to do whatever I want, they're sincere about it and follow through. If they want to do something servicey because it gets them off, they're honest about it and don't pretend that it's actually about my pleasure first. And if they really are wanting to focus on my pleasure, they listen and actually do the things that I find pleasurable, not the things they assume a woman should find pleasurable. My favourite clients also are into the kinks that I want to explore or are into something totally novel that I never get to do. I have fun no matter what, with a good client, but I get giddy with delight when I get to try something new or do my favourite things. Good clients respect my time and don't linger long after our session is done. They have a reasonable idea of what they might need for aftercare and communicate that to me so I can build it into our session time (quick clean up and you're good? 20 minutes of afterglow, cuddling and coming down?) They're warm and interactive after the session and don't seem ashamed or distant (these are valid emotional responses too, particularly since we sometimes explore very taboo stuff, and it doesn't make a person a bad client at all, but it's a difficult response for me, because I want everyone I see to leave feeling amazing.) 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SexyLacy 8537 Report post Posted April 25, 2014 A good client to me would be: Please be on time as you would expect me to be(if for whatever reason you cannot make the appointment please give notice for cancellation...Life happens and I truely do understand that) Good hygiene is a must(I always take a shower and brush my teeth before the appointment please do the same...if you need to take a shower you are more than welcome to at my place) Respect!(The upmost important thing on my list) please put the donation in an envelope and place on table before the appointment Good communication and positive vibes always! I was starting to think I was the only one who preferred an envelope ... glad to see that is not the case lol 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted April 25, 2014 I think a number of sps like the envelope, and a lot of clients as well. Me, not so much, but i don't think either way is righter or wronger or classier or trashier, just what they happen to prefer. (in other words if i get the donation in an envelope, i don't give it back to them and say take it out and give it to me proper lol) And i hope the enveloped sps don't worry too much if the client wants to take out his wallet and count it out one bill at a time. I think what makes a good client is someone i don't have to ask twice (let alone 3 or 4 times) for the fee after it has been confirmed in person. The other thing is common courtesy, I write as I sit here at 4:08, ready for an appt because someone said they wanted to come by at 4pm. No call to say they can't make it, no call to say they are running late. No call means not courteous, and not letting me get on with my day. 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted April 25, 2014 Some off the cuff ramblings Don't ask questions which are answered in the lady's website. Be on time, pay the donation in full up front. Also consider giving the lady a tip and gift Respect the lady's boundaries. Don't ask for services she doesn't offer Have something to drink when she arrives (wine, beer, water etc) You can always email and ask her what she likes. Maybe have some hors d'oeuvres too Think of writing a recommendation after a good encounter. Doesn't have to be a Pulitzer Prize essay, just a few lines saying you had a good time with the lady, she arrived on time etc etc etc Contact the lady using her preferred method of contact Many ladies utilize verification/screening. Be open and honest with the lady, providing the requested information. And always ask your reference's permission before using her as a reference Just a quick few ramblings RG 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Exotic Touch Danielle 31729 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 It really doesn't matter too much about the donation being in an envelope I would just prefer to have it dealt with before the appointment( and me not having to ask for it) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Ou**or**n Report post Posted April 26, 2014 It really doesn't matter too much about the donation being in an envelopeI would just prefer to have it dealt with before the appointment( and me not having to ask for it) I'm glad to see you brought this particular point up. I tend to hit the ATM on my way to see a lady and typically don't have an envelope. Envelopes are also big and hard to carry depending on the time of year. Some gents may have a hard time explaining to their SO's why the household envelopes keep going missing ;) I was wondering if the envelope part was important to other providers. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gabriella Laurence 301887 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 Some great points have been made regarding the "before and during" part of the encounter: contacting the lady by her preferred method and including the info she requires, impeccable hygiene, respecting her and her restrictions, handing her the envelop at the beginning of the encounter without having her ask for it, etc. For me, it goes a little further than that; although I have enjoyed my time with a patron and really like spending time in his company, I still expect him to respect our intimate professional arrangement (this is a NO strings attached business relationship) meaning that I do not want to feel obliged and have to correspond with him daily or weekly to catch up on everything in between appointments. Once in a while is all good but there needs to be a realistic limit. On a same note, I really appreciate it when a patron doesn't try to change the terms of our arrangement: we might have established a great NSA relationship that works for the both of us during our scheduled time together but it still doesn't mean that I want to see you "off the clock", so please, do not put me in a position where I have to decline your request. 5 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Exotic Touch Danielle 31729 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 Another great point made! What happens in my bedroom(or yours lol) stays there and when we part we leave what we did there until we meet again I personally don't mind friendly conversations from time to time and keeping in touch with each other til we meet again but please respect my personal life as I will respect yours 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CristyCurves 169032 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 Some off the cuff ramblingsDon't ask questions which are answered in the lady's website. Be on time, pay the donation in full up front. Also consider giving the lady a tip and gift Respect the lady's boundaries. Don't ask for services she doesn't offer Have something to drink when she arrives (wine, beer, water etc) You can always email and ask her what she likes. Maybe have some hors d'oeuvres too Think of writing a recommendation after a good encounter. Doesn't have to be a Pulitzer Prize essay, just a few lines saying you had a good time with the lady, she arrived on time etc etc etc Contact the lady using her preferred method of contact Many ladies utilize verification/screening. Be open and honest with the lady, providing the requested information. And always ask your reference's permission before using her as a reference Just a quick few ramblings RG They are ramblings RG but good ones;), no great ones! Why oh why couldn't they all be like you:) 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HonestPete 686 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 - If the ATM is located at a bank, walk inside and grab some envelopes off their counter tops. - Keep a few envelopes in your car or at your office. They don't take up much place. ;) - How can a piece of paper be big & hard to carry, since it folds up very easily & very small. It doesn't have to be wrinkle free, just filled with good money. lol - Buy yourself a box of envelopes. They're cheap. - Use a piece of 8"by11" paper and fold it around the bills so that it looks like an envelope. Works just as good. - To the CVS, etc. & spend a buck on a Thank you card. It comes with an envelope. :) - Plan ahead to have your money and envelope before the day of your tryst. I hope this helps & makes you smile on how easy and how many options Gents have if they just ... Plan ahead when you want head!!!! ;) ... I tend to hit the ATM on my way to see a lady and typically don't have an envelope. Envelopes are also big and hard to carry depending on the time of year. Some gents may have a hard time explaining to their SO's why the household envelopes keep going missing ;)... 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SexyLacy 8537 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 Yes I am in agreement with Danielle ... while I prefer an envelope I will still accept donation without one lol 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Exotic Touch Danielle 31729 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 Absolutely! Either way I will accept the.donation just as long as its the.correct donation for.our time spent and I.don't have to ask for it(I feel uncomfortable having to do so) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SexyLacy 8537 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 Absolutely! Either way I will accept the.donation just as long as its the.correct donation for.our time spent and I.don't have to ask for it(I feel uncomfortable having to do so) It makes me uncomfortable too... So usually if I don't see it or he makes no mention of it before the festivities start I will say something like "we should take care of business first" I don't like my dates to feel like an appointment so when I see the donation and he hands me the donation.. that's what it feels like. I don't date in my personal life so maybe that's why lol .... my own little fantasy I guess .... the BFE experience 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Ou**or**n Report post Posted April 26, 2014 I don't like my dates to feel like an appointment so when I see the donation and he hands me the donation.. Thanks for sharing this - this is the perspective I didn't understand. I could understand both the 'asking for' part and also the 'hands me' part. However the seeing of cash instead of an envelope wasn't something that would have ever dawned on me as something that would make someone feel different about the encounter. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Exotic Touch Danielle 31729 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 I feel the same way...I don't take the.donation.in hand I prefer for them to leave it on my drawer so.it doesn't feel.so business like 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Luckyme 41401 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 I feel the same way...I don't take the.donation.in hand I prefer for them to leave it on my drawer so.it doesn't feel.so business like Come to think of it, most of the ladies that I have seen prefer me to leave the envelop on top of the dresser or drawer instead of accepting them in their hands. I don't remember even one of them counting it. Their trust seems to make the session much more comfortable. And the question of envelop or not - my feeling is that money in an envelop is so nice, clean and tidy. We don't really want to touch the bills before we touch and caress each other. Just my thoughts. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 One other option to consider for paying is email money transfer. It's quick, paperless, no concerns about carrying a large amount of cash. I know for the ladies I see now, if they employ it, I pay the donation that way. Just a thought RG 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HonestPete 686 Report post Posted April 27, 2014 Are you Ladies only talking about new clients. Do you feel the same way with Gents you've seen many times? I used to use leave the envelopes on the table with my 2 ATF SPs, the first 3-4 times we met. After that, I just hand them the money, along with my normal generous tip. I've seen them 12+ times each, since 2011. They email me and/or call me just to keep in touch and not even ask if I wanted to meet them. We are very honest with each other. One of my Ladies retired in 2012, but she will still see me anytime I'm UP for it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brad 49548 Report post Posted April 27, 2014 So I think what we've learned is... Best: Acceptable in a pinch: And this is right out: 8 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites