Simplifying, paring down... advice from those who've pulled it off?

[JoyfulC 132299]

I am looking at moving this summer. This time, I am DETERMINED to pare down and get rid of all this stuff I seem to have collected somehow over the years. How did that even happen, anyway???

 

This past week, I've been making hard decisions, going through stuff in storage (which, if it's in storage, it probably could go, right? how come it doesn't seem that way when I get it out and look at it???). I never really considered myself a very materialistic person, and so I'm a bit shocked that I have hung on to so much stuff.

 

Anyone else here been through it? Any advice? Any cautions? Is gasoline and matches my best bet??

 

TIA.

[jafo105 39057]

I try to purge at least once a year. If I have not used something in the past 12 months. I get rid of it. With the exception of family heirlooms -- they stay for ever. Speaking of which -- May is time for my next purge. ;)

[roamingguy 300292]

What I did was drop the tailgate down on my pick-up. Got some heavy duty garbage bags and went to town.

It didn't matter whether the item was still good or not, if I hadn't used it at all, not even looked at it, the item was considered garbage and thrown out.

No sentimentality, get ruthless. If I hadn't used it or missed it, it got trashed

Only one caveat. Clothes...the ones that suffered from closet shrinkage LOL donated where it could be used by someone in need. But most of the stuff (7 trips to the dump) thrown out.

Feels real good after you do it. And I don't have regrets over anything that I've thrown out

 

RG

[JoyfulC 132299]

Oh, I agree, RG!

 

One of the hardest things to get rid of is books. You see all these people online pontificating about how they prefer the feel of *real* books to ebooks. Where are these people when it comes time to adopt some??? Many of my books are from the 70s, 80s, 90s -- politics, economy, reference, predictions of future trends (that mostly ended up being wrong!) -- but stuff that's definitely no longer relevant. So I'm having to recycle them. Tear the covers off and put them out with paper recycling. I never, in a million years, envisioned myself having to do that.

 

But some of my books are still valuable, IMHO, even if my library doesn't accept anything older than a year. Someone online had a great suggestion, to donate books to the library that you think they should accept that their policies don't accept, just sneak them into the return slot after dark. Bwahahaha! I love it! Then it's their problem. ;)

 

And yes, Jafo, I have learned my lesson. Once downsized, I will take your excellent advice and never, ever, ever let things get so out of hand again. I will get in a regular habit.

[Athos 108589]

Well, I wish I could achieve it. I don't feel great attachment to things, but others in my family do. As a result, even purging becomes a lengthy process of taking eveyrthing out of every box, reminiscing abouther it, considering it, deciding about whether it stays or goes. As a result the process is so time consuming, that we never bloody finish it. Be ruthless and be quick. Make a decision within the first few seconds of something being in your hand. It's like pulling a bandaid off. It needs to be done quickly.

 

Even better ... hire someone with no sentimentality or attachment to your things. As a general rule, I also agree with the "if I haven't used it/worn it in the past year, then it should go" philosophy.

 

Porthos

[Regent 35404]

I used to be terrible for clutter and keeping things I didn't need. Not hoarder levels by any means, but boxes and boxes of things in storage that I hadn't looked at for years, piles of books, clothes that still fit but I hadn't worn in ages (but I might!), stacks of stuff I might use or reference some day...

 

Then several years ago I was in a position where I needed to move cities, and I didn't want to spend a pile of money doing multiple trips or renting a moving truck, so I decided I needed to aggressively pare down. It was haaaaard. I really had to work to change my mindset before I could be successful at it.

 

I used to have hundreds of books. I got rid of almost all of them, only keeping ones that I really loved and knew I would re-read. Everything else, I reminded myself, was replaceable or could be picked up at the library.

 

I gave myself permission to get rid of things like birthday cards and photographs. I kept one shoebox to hang on to really sentimental items, like cards from my grandparents who are no longer here, a few small childhood items, and photo negatives. If it didn't fit neatly in that box I'd have to really work hard to justify keeping it.

 

With most other stuff - clothes, decor, kitchen stuff, etc, I tried to ask myself:

- Do I really love this? Will I actually miss it if it's gone?

- Can I replace it easily?

- Can I replace it with something better?

- Is the cost or effort of moving it more than the cost/effort of getting rid of it and replacing it?

- Would this bring someone else more joy than it brings me?

 

I found the honest answers to these questions resulted in me getting rid of most things that weren't small, valuable and useful.

 

A few other things that were really helpful for me:

 

Practice. Getting rid of stuff and then realizing that I didn't regret it or miss it helped a lot. The fear that I would get rid of something and then want it later was a big barrier initially.

 

Making money. I didn't want to put a lot of effort into selling many small, inexpensive things, but where I could get a decent chunk of money in one shot for something, it was often well worth it. Having $100 instead of this thing I wasn't actually that into felt great.

 

Giving things away. I hate throwing things in the garbage. It feels so wasteful and I feel guilty about the environment and so on, and so contemplating throwing something in the trash was a much bigger emotional decision than giving it to someone who would make use of it. Thrift stores are great but they only take certain types of things. Discovering things like Freecycle, Artsjunktion and other ways to divert things from the landfill made everything a lot easier - places like this are often good for getting rid of stuff that's almost garbage (old greeting cards, the dregs of a bucket of paint, a broke light fixture, broken dishes, clothing with holes etc.)

 

Having people take things away. One of the wonderful things about Freecycle and selling items in the classifieds is that people come to your home and deal with the heavy lifting. You don't have to move stuff yourself - it just goes away, and sometimes people leave money behind. Either way, it's less work than dropping stuff off at the thrift store or landfill (or even hauling it out back to the dumpster.)

 

If you're really not sure, deal with it later. If you're finding it really hard to make a decision, stick that thing in a box and move on to something else. It was really easy to get caught up agonizing over something, which was bad for productivity. Giving myself permission to deal with certain items later and move on to other stuff that was easier to get rid of kept me moving in the right direction and making progress. Sometimes I could revisit those items later that day, sometimes I needed to keep them for a year or a month before I could feel okay deciding to be rid of them.

 

Once you've decluttered and pared down, stay on top of it. Do it on a regular basis and be selective about what you buy and bring into your home. If it's not useful and/or beautiful; if you don't love it or really need it, don't let it cross your threshold.

 

Good luck!

[Studio 110 by Sophia 150333]

I am a minimalist, I always keep what is really important to me.

ask:

Is this important to me?

Will I use it again? Have I used in 1 year?

If not, will others benefit from it as a donation?

If not 100% sure, then I will keep it one more year.

 

I do not like "stuff", counters cleared, few boxes in the closet or garage...that is all!

I see when stuff when shopping, and ask myself, how can I use it? Where would it go? And If I cant answer this, then I say wait a week, and if I still want it, then will go get it. This way it is not just an impulse buy.

 

GOOD LUCK!!

[fortunateone 156618]

I prefer the recycling route as well. Find the people who pick these things up, or will take the drop offs like thrift shops, family shelters, food banks, women's centres, seniors centres, and retirement homes will probably like the books, as well as useful things. If you aren't looking to make a profit on stuff, there will always be someone who can use it.

 

Even the dumps in certain areas have recyclable places, where good used items can be picked up for 'nearly free' and gives it a chance to go to a new home, while you personally only have to take it to one place.

[Studio 110 by Sophia 150333]

I prefer the recycling route as well. Find the people who pick these things up, or will take the drop offs like thrift shops, family shelters, food banks, women's centres, seniors centres, and retirement homes will probably like the books, as well as useful things. If you aren't looking to make a profit on stuff, there will always be someone who can use it.

 

Even the dumps in certain areas have recyclable places, where good used items can be picked up for 'nearly free' and gives it a chance to go to a new home, while you personally only have to take it to one place.

 

I agree, fully and completely on recycling and reusing!

On that point, when I donate for reuse, I make sure donation are in good condition first. Cause I don't want those in need having to rummage for something that is ugly, torn and stained.

[50 Shades Raven 31380]

Anything like furniture, household items that still work, clothing (that is wearable, ) ask your local shelter if they can take donations of usable articles.

 

This way, someone starting on their own again may be able to benefit from what you don't need :)

I did a purge a couple of years ago, and man, was I surprised at some of the 'things' I held on to.

Sure, sentimental family things, yes, absolutely I held on to, but stuff from my college days, that stuff went.

 

I gave duplicates of things to a local shelter and boy were they glad to get it.

(I had two kitchens in my house, so they got everything from one!)

 

It will feel good when you realize what you can actually live without.

[Brad 49548]

I think a lot of the difficulty some people have with paring down is that each item when looked at by itself seems to have value. Either it could be useful or has some sentimental attachment.

 

If you're keeping something because someday it may be useful, give yourself permission to get rid of it knowing you may one day end up needing the item. You can get rid of 100 things that way and will probably find you only ever end up having to retrieve 1 of them.

 

As for sentimental items, I think the trick is to keep a selection of items that can symbolize everything. Do you have 100 things that all belonged to a relative and are therefore sentimental? Pick 3 of them that can represent them all.

 

If it is just a matter of general clutter, pick a couple boxes and make the rule that you can keep whatever you are able to fit into them and everything else has to go. You'll quickly discover which items are most important to you!

[Katherine of Halifax 113932]

My father was a super hoarder, he had tools from the 1800's full of rust and totally useless. He had boxes and boxes of new presents never used and always forgot what he owned. Sometimes for fun we would give him something in a box from a few years previous. He never knew the difference.

Old clothing, blankets home spun, butter churns, his own baby crib and playpen, farm equipment, washers, dryers, toasters and all parts of anything that could be reused.

 

Storage? No way, we had barns and many acres to hold his inventory. it had to be handy in case it was needed. My father was also able to fix just about anything from a car to a broken Barbie Doll. People came from miles away to get their broken TV's radios , and waffle irons fixed. So, we had everyone else's junk piled high as well, he had a regular job and could never keep up.

 

Upon his death my mother had a huge yard sale and what she did not sell she had a truck come and take it all away. I took for myself a set of sleigh bells and still have them. I wanted to have one thing that was really important to him.

 

All his things were so important to him yet wiped out within a week.

 

Something for all hoarders to think about.

[JoyfulC 132299]

Ironically, as I'm sorting through stuff to be put up for sale, stuff to be freecycled, stuff to go to the community yard sale for charity, and stuff to go to the dump this week, I'm still frantically searching for the original video files for some of my favourite videos in my members' area. I'd converted them to swf years ago, when I was assured that flash was the way of the future, and now I can't for the life of me get them to convert back into anything decent. And I cannot find those original files. Only my favourites. Of course. Of course!

[Guest K***e D****ls]

Every spring and fall I do a serious 2 day cleaning spree and even in 6 months it's amazing what accumulates! If I haven't worn/used this item in the last year, it's gotta go.

 

Here's how I break it down:

 

Clothes: I either sell (consignment shops for brand name luxury items), donate (gently used clothes, shoes, bags, etc) or toss (stained, ripped, something I wouldn't wear period because of a defect or whatnot)

 

Books: Donate to Goodwill or Value Village

 

Household items: Donate

 

I can't justify throwing things out unless it's broken, stained, or not useable. So many people go to value Village or Goodwill and can use those donated goods.

 

If you're in the area for it, a yard sale is a great idea. Make a little cash and I've always found yard sale-ing fun. haha

[Guest S****r]

I use fullcirclesottawa.org a lot. There is likely one in your area, too. Then people come right to your door to pick it up, too. Check out the yahoo groups area for one near you.

 

Happy sorting!

[JoyfulC 132299]

If you're in the area for it, a yard sale is a great idea. Make a little cash and I've always found yard sale-ing fun. haha

 

It's a good idea, but it's not for everyone. We did the yard sale thing once, a few years back, and if I ever get to thinking of doing it again, I'm going to take the short cut, find a brick, and just smack myself in the face repeatedly with it until the urge passes. Same thing.

[Miss Jessica Lee 43328]

Every time I buy a new blouse I dispose of an old one. Clothes are my weakness and I already have a well stocked wardrobe so I don't allow myself to accumulate more. Adding one means giving one up. No question.

 

OCD helps. LoL

[bewlayb 7480]

It's a good idea, but it's not for everyone. We did the yard sale thing once, a few years back, and if I ever get to thinking of doing it again, I'm going to take the short cut, find a brick, and just smack myself in the face repeatedly with it until the urge passes. Same thing.

 

LOL! I'm the same way about hosting garage sales. Got a brick to spare amongst your hoard?

[JoyfulC 132299]

LOL! I'm the same way about hosting garage sales. Got a brick to spare amongst your hoard?

 

Uh. Actually, yes. I have a whole stack of them, back in the corner between the dressers in the massage room. We had been using them with boards to make some shelves, but when we replaced it with another shelving unit, they never quite found their way downstairs.

 

I am really making some progress here!! I can see the place emptying out! Yay!!

 

(BTW, Bewlay Brothers? Way cool!! LERV Bowie.)