menuisier 450 Report post Posted July 10, 2014 welcome Shelley. Hope all turns out well for you and don't blame yourself. I can give you more insight if you want. Pm me if you wish. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted July 11, 2014 Did the OP (Shelly) catch her husband in June of 2013 and just now, a year later looking at exploring things, or is the "join date" just a typo? Thank you for point this out. I wanted to say 'don't feed the troll' but too many very nice and reasonable people came out before me lol 5 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jabba 18389 Report post Posted July 11, 2014 I'm a provider and knowing what many clients have told me and how they do love their wives but seek something that isn't in the marriage anymore or for other various reasons is very common. Everyone has their reasons for seeking out SPs or MAs, etc. I fully understand this and don't judge. Otherwise I wouldn't be in this line of work. I also know what it's like to be in her position and to be blindsighted by this. So I understand from both sides of the fence. Jabba, do you know what it's like to have your partner seek outside physical intimacy without your knowledge? Maybe you do, maybe you don't but please do not put words in my mouth! I never said she was a victim. It takes two in a marriage and a lot of work to keep a marriage going. Interpret it as you see fit but what you are alluding to is just plain wrong! ..................- I really don't wanna start a pissing contest and maybe this thread has run it's course. You're a well respected member who's been around the block & you have honest, nice posts. I want to respond in a respectful way - but I do feel the need for a response. For the sake of discussion and some fun, let's do a little role reversal: Lets replace all male references in your post with female references and see how it smells: .................. I've been in the same situation when I was in your position once upon a time. Looking back, I find that those who see escorts or frequent massage parlours are looking for something physical. Imo, I consider it far worse if a female were to have an emotional affair than to visit a sex worker. Females are also visual creatures. I'm not condoning what your wife has done but if there has been a lack of communication or lack of sex, women decide to take things into their own hands. I think the best thing to do is confront your wife and let her know that you know about her activities and ask her why. Communication is key here and then you can begin to make sense of it all. And please don't blame yourself. ..................- I hope that puts my thoughts in perspective....maybe, maybe not? Am I just being too sensitive? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest *Ste***cque** Report post Posted July 11, 2014 I thought Hutts had very thick skin. ;) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest *l**e Report post Posted July 12, 2014 i still don't think there is anything wrong with it with the roles reversed. it perhaps over generalizes a bit, but if the OP had been speaking of his wife instead of her hubby, it would seem to me that you were trying to be helpful to him...to hurtful to all women. I think if people would just stop and try to consider the intent of the speaker rather than focusing on their own interpretation of the words, fewer people would be offended by things and more people would understand and empathize with each other. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ice4fun 78407 Report post Posted July 12, 2014 i still don't think there is anything wrong with it with the roles reversed. it perhaps over generalizes a bit, but if the OP had been speaking of his wife instead of her hubby, it would seem to me that you were trying to be helpful to him...to hurtful to all women. I think if people would just stop and try to consider the intent of the speaker rather than focusing on their own interpretation of the words, fewer people would be offended by things and more people would understand and empathize with each other. I agree 100% 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Spurssuck 150 Report post Posted August 14, 2014 Many times it has simply to do with wanting to try someone new. Regardless of what society expects from us, we are sometimes driven to try the "forbidden". Wouold be much worse if he was having an emotionally connected affair. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dtr_acr 120 Report post Posted August 27, 2014 Don't act too rashly to such news. You have to take care of yourself. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites