Guest *l**e Report post Posted August 18, 2014 So, a prospective client (not from cerb) asked me if I could send a pic that includes my face and they (its a couple) also asked if we could meet for a coffee before they book with me. I explained, that I do not send face pics. I offered to skype or facetime with them so they could see me and we could talk a bit, but they said that these things don't work where they are because of slow internet connection speeds. I replied, that while I totally understand their opinion, but that uit simply wasn't feasible for me. If I had to have a coffee meeting with every client prior to actually booking every appointment, it would mean double the time, plus travel, etc for each booking. Am I being too rigid? I mean, we are not meeting off a dating site, I'm providing a service. You wouldn't ask your plumber to meet you for coffee before you let him in your house for repairs. I get that the service I'm providing is not plumbing (not exactly, anyways...lol) and is far more intimate, but am I way off?? Opinions....guys and ladies please. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
EmilyRushton 253372 Report post Posted August 18, 2014 This type of stuff happens all the time, I show my face yet people ask for full nude photos - not going to happen EVER. You offered them Skype as an option and that was not feasible for them. Sounds like pic collectors to me, however I could be wrong. Why not offer a social rate for any meet and greets that way your being compensated for your time and if they are serious about booking, they won't balk at this. Or like anyone else if they are not happy with how you do things and how you present yourself, they can seek other company - anytime you have to adjust your policies for anyone they fuck you over. 7 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest *l**e Report post Posted August 18, 2014 that's kind of how I'm feeling; if they super insist on meeting me in advance, they should have to pay for my time. Thanks Emily Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Meaghan McLeod 179664 Report post Posted August 18, 2014 I agree with Emily. I get lots who want meet publicly and want more pics. I move on. Your decision if you want to see them. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted August 18, 2014 Respect the lady's (or gentleman's) boundaries and booking procedures. A client or true prospective client would understand that. Tell them you'd love to be taken out for coffee (or dinner ;-) ) and that your rate for such a social encounter is...well whatever you set If your face is hidden, it's because you have a reason. Tell them if you had face pics to offer they would be in your album for all to see, not just them. How do you know it isn't someone who thinks they might know you in "civilian" life and wants to "out" you. Or is a picture collector. Oh, and a prospective client should know social dates, like dinner dates, are very enjoyable too in their own right, even if you can't eat all the food on the table (sorry, flashbacks to a few weeks ago where the best part of a nice dinner out was the company) Your not way off, their request is unreasonable. Anyhow a few ramblings. RG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
piano8950 32577 Report post Posted August 18, 2014 If your rationale for not sending face pictures is because of privacy, be careful with Skype or Face time. Screenshots can be taken easily. 6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest K***e D****ls Report post Posted August 18, 2014 You took the words out of my mouth, piano8950. If you FaceTime or Skype but yet you blur your face, it's completely moot. A simple click and they have those images. If someone tells me they aren't comfortable booking me without seeing my face, I won't entertain that crap. Go book someone who shows their face. I have reviews all stating what my face looks like so if I looked like a little troll, I'm sure it would have come out over the last 5 years being in the business! Yes, looks are so incredibly subjective, but you'd at least get the idea. Don't entertain it. Bid them a pleasant farewell and that be that. Why on earth would you meet someone beforehand to see if they 'liked' your face? Surely they can do their homework and see what others have said. How do you know they wouldn't no-show at your table at Starbucks but show up and take a picture of you? Stick to your guns. These are your rules and that's really all there is to it. :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest *Ste***cque** Report post Posted August 18, 2014 I can see a couple wanting to have a coffee meeting beforehand as the woman probably wants a sense of how the 3 way dynamics may play out. Those things are harder to determine without face to face time. If I were in demand (and I wish I were :)), I would probably offer a social fee for meeting a couple. I can recall some SP's saying they like to meet the woman on a 3 way encounter ahead of time so they can make sure things go well. Nothing worse than realizing during the encounter that the woman isn't that into it. I understand the request, at least. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted August 18, 2014 I can see a couple wanting to have a coffee meeting beforehand as the woman probably wants a sense of how the 3 way dynamics may play out. Those things are harder to determine without face to face time.If I were in demand (and I wish I were :)), I would probably offer a social fee for meeting a couple. I can recall some SP's saying they like to meet the woman on a 3 way encounter ahead of time so they can make sure things go well. Nothing worse than realizing during the encounter that the woman isn't that into it. I understand the request, at least. The dynamic in a SP meeting a wife/gf/SO is because usually the man and the SP know one another, or it's the man's idea (often a surprise) for his wife/gf/SO to partake with him in a threesome. Some men think their fantasy is also their SO's fantasy In this case it sounds like a couple are approaching Il Re together as one client, not one client approaching him about a threesome with his/her SO The logic of seeing a professional, be it MA/MP/SP before an encounter to see if you have chemistry to have an encounter is all well and fine. But compensate the MA/MP/SP for his/her time for that meeting. BTW that logic of seeing a professional before an encounter really then should apply to ALL prospective dates then, not just couples massages, menage a trois etc...all dates. Because all dates to be good require chemistry That couple that contacted Il Re, my advice to them, the best way to see if you have chemistry, book with him. Be it in this case or any type of encounter MA/MP/or SP, there is an element of unknown on your first date It's part of the excitement of seeing a professional My two cents A rambling RG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mrgreen760 37785 Report post Posted August 18, 2014 A while back a local SP insisted on an initial meet for coffee prior to booking an appointment. No fee was charged for the meet and greet which made sense as it was her request and part of her screening process. Peace MG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jasmine Rain 23126 Report post Posted August 19, 2014 So, a prospective client (not from cerb) asked me if I could send a pic that includes my face and they (its a couple) also asked if we could meet for a coffee before they book with me.I explained, that I do not send face pics. I offered to skype or facetime with them so they could see me and we could talk a bit, but they said that these things don't work where they are because of slow internet connection speeds. I replied, that while I totally understand their opinion, but that uit simply wasn't feasible for me. If I had to have a coffee meeting with every client prior to actually booking every appointment, it would mean double the time, plus travel, etc for each booking. Am I being too rigid? I mean, we are not meeting off a dating site, I'm providing a service. You wouldn't ask your plumber to meet you for coffee before you let him in your house for repairs. I get that the service I'm providing is not plumbing (not exactly, anyways...lol) and is far more intimate, but am I way off?? Opinions....guys and ladies please. You are not off base at all in my opinion. This is a professional service and just like other professional services, you should be paid for your time. While I understand and can sympathize with the possibilities of the wife wanting a little more assurance before the actual date, this industry does not come with a free consultation and even most professional services don't do the free consultation thing when in demand. Which your business is. A service in demand. There are also other alternatives that the couple has to seek a suitable arrangement that meets their requirements. For example a dating site where they can meet people before hand. There is no need to change your booking policies to suit the comfortably of a couple you do not even know personally. Stick to your guns, and be safe. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted August 19, 2014 that's kind of how I'm feeling; if they super insist on meeting me in advance, they should have to pay for my time. Thanks Emily You could set a fee for this that if you want to, comes off the session fee. or 50% of it is deducted from the session fee. YOu have to keep in mind that you cannot meet in a public place and discuss rates and services anyway, so if that is their intention, you can simply decline by pointing that it is considered 'public solicitation' which you and they would be guilty of it you agreed, and the discussion took a turn towards fees or services. A few things come to mind with these kinds of enquiries. One has been mentioned: the picture collector. They want all your info, but provide none. They want a face pic, then arrange for you to show up somewhere, they know what you look like, but you don't know if they are watching you from somewhere, what you drove, etc. Don't do it. The other thing that I suggest is it is supposed to be a couple. You have to speak (on the phone in other words) to both halves of this couple. you have to verify that it is actually a couple. You have to verify that she really is on board with this and not just 'going along'. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted August 19, 2014 You could set a fee for this that if you want to, comes off the session fee. or 50% of it is deducted from the session fee. YOu have to keep in mind that you cannot meet in a public place and discuss rates and services anyway, so if that is their intention, you can simply decline by pointing that it is considered 'public solicitation' which you and they would be guilty of it you agreed, and the discussion took a turn towards fees or services. A few things come to mind with these kinds of enquiries. One has been mentioned: the picture collector. They want all your info, but provide none. They want a face pic, then arrange for you to show up somewhere, they know what you look like, but you don't know if they are watching you from somewhere, what you drove, etc. Don't do it. The other thing that I suggest is it is supposed to be a couple. You have to speak (on the phone in other words) to both halves of this couple. you have to verify that it is actually a couple. You have to verify that she really is on board with this and not just 'going along'. Just thinking of the safety issue reminded me of the Tim Bosma case lured away under guise of a test drive http://globalnews.ca/news/560553/tim-bosma-a-timeline-of-the-police-investigation/ Maybe this could be something similar (not saying it is) They might be scheming something Or not that but want face pics, for what? Some might think the obvious, but what if they are trying to confirm your identity for nefarious purposes. They are asking an awful lot from you...what do you know about them RG 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest K***e D****ls Report post Posted August 19, 2014 I think of it as dollars and cents. When I started out, if I had met with every person who 'wasn't sure' and 'wanted to meet me for a drink first', I would be broke as a joke, having free drinks all over the place. LOL That's not how this works. It's kind of the same thing as twitter: some guys won't ever book you but would chat allllllll day for free if you were game. That's not how this business works. If you have a social half hour drink/coffee rate, that's different (though I would be very concerned about privacy issues as mentioned in this thread), but meeting for free all over like some people ask is getting something for nothing. And where do you draw the line at exceptions? Sometimes it's just easier to keep that line firm and clear in the sand and if someone doesn't like it, they can move on. I think for a couple, if they've done their homework, they'll know what you're about and if they're genuinely interested. If it makes them more comfortable, a chat on the phone with all the parties should be enough to put everyone at ease. Anything after that is extra that I wouldn't feel is necessary. That's just me. We all operate differently and that's the joy of all of this! haha Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
blue_eyes56 2010 Report post Posted August 19, 2014 Since your fee is very reasonable, their risk in booking a session is miniscule. No need to overcomplicate things with social meetings/skype/pics - if they're not willing to just book, I'd send them on their way. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gentleman11 10508 Report post Posted August 29, 2014 A while back a local SP insisted on an initial meet for coffee prior to booking an appointment. No fee was charged for the meet and greet which made sense as it was her request and part of her screening process. Peace MG Obviously excepting MG's experience, I would die of embarassment before asking a lady to meet and not compensate her in a fashion that she expects. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Jessica Lee 43328 Report post Posted August 30, 2014 in the future this may become an even more precarious situation ... if it's illegal to discuss our business transactions in any place a person under 18 might reasonably be expected to be, a public meeting in advance could not only be risky it could be a sting. I won't meet anyone in public without first discussing every facet of our date in private. I had a dinner date once who insisted on asking me 'twenty questions' while we dined.. it was most uncomfortable. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Cr**gCa***ng Report post Posted August 30, 2014 I would stick to my privacy and business policy for all the reasons stated previously. You have nothing to gain and everything to lose by deviating from your policy. Once photos are sent or videos are done they are out there beyond your control. I wouldn't venture away from the safety and security of your rules or good judgement. Lots of "red flags" here. Take care of yourself please!! So, a prospective client (not from cerb) asked me if I could send a pic that includes my face and they (its a couple) also asked if we could meet for a coffee before they book with me.I explained, that I do not send face pics. I offered to skype or facetime with them so they could see me and we could talk a bit, but they said that these things don't work where they are because of slow internet connection speeds. I replied, that while I totally understand their opinion, but that uit simply wasn't feasible for me. If I had to have a coffee meeting with every client prior to actually booking every appointment, it would mean double the time, plus travel, etc for each booking. Am I being too rigid? I mean, we are not meeting off a dating site, I'm providing a service. You wouldn't ask your plumber to meet you for coffee before you let him in your house for repairs. I get that the service I'm providing is not plumbing (not exactly, anyways...lol) and is far more intimate, but am I way off?? Opinions....guys and ladies please. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VedaSloan 119179 Report post Posted August 30, 2014 You give them an inch, they'll take a mile. Charge a social fee if you're comfortable with that, otherwise, send them packing. They sound like WOTs (waste of time) to me. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest P*rry Report post Posted August 30, 2014 Thanks Berlin for WOTS. I like that term. Il Re: One reason why I like the CERB socials is it gives me the chance to meet people before booking a session. It's like a coffee meeting except with wine or beer! And, I wouldn't expect to meet privately for a get acquainted meeting without paying a fee. It is your time after all. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Cr**gCa***ng Report post Posted August 30, 2014 (edited) Here I go being different again about all this but I very much enjoy the fact I have yet to enjoy some face time with the lady I am about to meet for an encounter. I very much enjoy the emails or PMs involved setting things up with a CERB lady and feeling the tension build. If I went to a meet and greet it would feel like going to a job interview and all the associated BS that goes along with it. I can very much get a feel as to what the lady is like based upon her posts, threads and to some extent her pictures even if no face shots are included. I won't ever ask for pictures of any sort nor do I feel I should have to provide them to an SP as a potential client but I am happy to provide a physical description and a brief rundown of my lifestyle etc. Edited August 30, 2014 by Cr**gCa***ng Correction Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
50 Shades Raven 31380 Report post Posted August 30, 2014 I can see that they are interested, but everyone is right, have a 'meet and greet' rate. This way you can toss aside all the 'pic collectors', wot's and not waste your time. This is a business, just like any other professional business, and you are entitled to rate a fee of what you think is fair for your time. If you think it is too good to be true, it generally is. You gave them some options, and they didn't go for it, trust your instincts. Your time is valuable, don't waste it by 'seeing everyone beforehand'. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
misterdiscretion2014 2032 Report post Posted September 2, 2014 I want to start off first by saying that no one should have their time wasted, even if it isn't a traditional type of business (though many would argue it's the oldest), it's still a business, and if you consider nuisance requests without looking at your bottom line, you won't be in business for long. With that said, I wanted to comment on the various tire kickers out there, that quite often end up asking a zillion questions and making you jump through another zillion hoops, only to NOT book with you in the end. I'm curious how many people who do this have no, or very limited, experience with courtesans. I say this because, before I had seen many ladies, I was much more prone to asking (stupid) questions. In hindsight, I think I was always looking for a reason to back out, something just out of place to justify my inner chicken sh*t and not take the plunge. It's not a particularly good reason, but it was my reason. I was fortunate enough to come across an sp who found a very polite and tactful way to tell me to "sh*t, or get off the pot", which was the nudge I didn't realize I needed. Perhaps this is a very round about way of saying, if you prod these people with a little common sense, they might just come around. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites