Soleil Sublime 38108 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 The following is a true story. Client walks in, exchanges pleasantries and asks if I have any spray. Spray? I ask. 'Yeah, for the bathroom,' he replies. 'Um, uh yeah, it's behind the toilet.' Great. So this guy is going to take a dump just moments before I am to give him oral. F-A-B-U-L-O-U-S. But it gets worse. Because I hear it. Plop, whish, plop plop. He left the door open! Now I'm holding in my vomit. He flushes the toilet, only to come back without washing his hands! And claims he doubt it all went down. Huh? Apparently, he'll have to go back before he leaves to make sure he gets it all down with a second flush. Now how's that for foreplay? I think we need a puking Smilie for this one. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
v*****m*n 220 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 some mothers do have them Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
E.D. man 691 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Take him in the shower and wash him!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mrgreen760 37785 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Yikes!! Makes me feel a dream boat right about now :p Peace Mr Green Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
renegade 11027 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 should add it in this section as well-I hope the tip was massive-lmfao-some peoples kids !! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jg24 3708 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Dont let the door hit you on the way out Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Soleil Sublime 38108 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Take him in the shower and wash him!!!!! Of course I did! But that wasn't in line with the grossness factor of the story, so I left it out. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jman47 233 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 The following is a true story. Client walks in, exchanges pleasantries and asks if I have any spray. Spray? I ask. 'Yeah, for the bathroom,' he replies. 'Um, uh yeah, it's behind the toilet.' Great. So this guy is going to take a dump just moments before I am to give him oral. F-A-B-U-L-O-U-S. But it gets worse. Because I hear it. Plop, whish, plop plop. He left the door open! Now I'm holding in my vomit. He flushes the toilet, only to come back without washing his hands! And claims he doubt it all went down. Huh? Apparently, he'll have to go back before he leaves to make sure he gets it all down with a second flush. Now how's that for foreplay? I think we need a puking Smilie for this one. Hello Soleil, Somehow you just gotta laugh.:sm185: Fortunately no, I cannot beat that one. Seems you are either born with class, aquire ir early in your upbringing or never have any at all...unfortunately for you , you found someone in group 3.:rolleyes: Anyway...try to keep having fun, jman47 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest W***ledi*Time Report post Posted April 14, 2010 ... I think we need a puking Smilie for this one. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 well...consider it that he provided a real Husband Experiance..........hehehehe... Seriously......that is just plain......well....rude..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TracieGold 282 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Manners are something unknown for some people....he could have stop at the gas station....and on top of it does not wash his hands.........Jeeppers.....didn't you put him under the shower for a bit?....bless you darling, you have the manners.....big hug! Tracie G.:oops: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NotchJohnson 214123 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Your story made me laugh out loud, even if I think it was rude of him to do so. I would have stopped at a gas station before and done my business there and then would have asked you if I could take a shower before beginning anything. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OldBuck 1074 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 I got a bit nauseous myself just reading about your experiences. Less maners than a billy goat and a hell of a lot less foreplay! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Victoria Banks 21899 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Eww.. What a pig with poor Mannerisms .. Couldn't he of went somewhere before the encounter? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A***** A***** 510 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Dayummmmmm is all I can say, you poor lady, geez some peoples lack of manners!:x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ava Foxx 1747 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 I have 2 stories, yes 2, that can beat yours but they are too vile to share publicly :(:(:( . UPDATE: I PM'd the details to Soleil. I'm pretty sure that she can vouch that my stories are pretty gross...lol! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NotchJohnson 214123 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Sorry I thought this was the brown shower thread.........my bad. Why did he have to go and do that? :confused: 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
clancy 142 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 WOW, now that is just gross! Did he say "Mommy I`m done :fes: you can come clean me now"? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A***** A***** 510 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 I have 2 stories, yes 2, that can beat yours but they are too vile to share publicly :(:(:( . UPDATE: I PM'd the details to Soleil. I'm pretty sure that she can vouch that my stories are pretty gross...lol! I thought I have seen and heard it all, but I guess you beat me to it ava:lol: My most "interesting" moment was when a client was cutting up a rock with his COSTCO card, and sniffing it with a 20 bill:| Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
capitalman 3861 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Come on!!! Let's hear them!!! I have 2 stories, yes 2, that can beat yours but they are too vile to share publicly :(:(:( . UPDATE: I PM'd the details to Soleil. I'm pretty sure that she can vouch that my stories are pretty gross...lol! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Meg O'Ryan 266444 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Ava...you are a tease! Now we are all just dying to find out exactly how vile! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A***** A***** 510 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Ava...you are a tease! Now we are all just dying to find out exactly how vile! I know, I am, curiosity killed the cat eh? :bddog: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Meg O'Ryan 266444 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 I am working my way to my 7th life....only 2 more to go....SAVE ME!:boobies: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A***** A***** 510 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 I am working my way to my 7th life....only 2 more to go....SAVE ME!:boobies: Same here, after all the trouble I have gotten into in this life time, 9 is coming up pretty darned fast:lol: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Soleil Sublime 38108 Report post Posted April 14, 2010 Out of respect to our wonderful Ava, I will not disclose her horror stories. However, I will say she beat me. HANDS DOWN! :bowdown: Thanks for making me feel better Ava! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites