PM's from people with no posts

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

... I don't like putting people in classes anyway we are all equal right? ....

 

Yup. No-one begins as a member of the in-crowd.

 

Every individual who uses CERB in any manner whatsoever of their own choosing should be respected -- until or unless they misuse that privilege.

 

The way to address any actual problem behaviour is directly with the individual who offends, not by a general smear against all CERB members who do not fit some arbitrary definition of "legitimacy". "Lurking" -- in the sense of just passively watching and reading -- is not problem behaviour.

[Guest a**m*s]

nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

[Andee 220524]

I believe in keeping it simple.

 

If you get a pm regarding a lady, simply refer them to their recommendations if they have any

 

and/or

 

Suggest they contact the lady directly.

 

Period.

[redmachine 1916]

[

Yeah, exactly. This seems to be the point that Redmachine and Emma are getting at.

 

The key factor for me is that the pm'ing without posting seems different. There I find myself agreeing with what I believe Antlerman and Annessa are saying: first, that I am more likely to be helpful if I think the person will share back; and second, that a lack of posts over a long period of time, or a crude request for personal details, leads me to make some sort of value judgment about who I'm dealing with.

 

You are correct it is different and my apologies if we have hi-jacked your thread in any way.

Pm'ing someone with a crude request for personal details is not cool no matter how many post the person has.

[Suzirider 737]

those lurkers that also feel entitled to getting a lot of individual help who generate most of these bad feelings.

And gathering fruit without doing a little ground work.

As in, PMing a lady saying something like, "I have a CERB handle, why should I go to your website ? (I don't need screening your way)"

[Royalfun 55449]

I believe in keeping it simple.

 

If you get a pm regarding a lady, simply refer them to their recommendations if they have any

 

and/or

 

Suggest they contact the lady directly.

 

Period.

 

You said it. And hurray hurray for common sense.

[BownChickaBown 4829]

Correct me if I am wrong is this not what this site is all about?

Since you asked... IMHO, short answer: No.

 

Based on my understanding of logic, this is wrong because if everyone was a lurker and no one ever contributed (content to be lurked over), then there would be no CERB, and therefore only lurking would be counter to what this site is all about - contributing in the form of recommendations (it's stated right in the site name ;) I believe there is a reason to why it's not called the Canadian Escorts Lurking Board :???:).

 

(But that's not to say lurkers cannot exist on CERB feeding off the contributions of others, as obviously for most all active communities with respected contributors there will always be those whom lurk over these other people's contributions without ever giving back - tis life - but it's Not what this, or other communities, are all about. Lurking is secondary to the process, not principal.)

 

*W.I.T. makes a prime distinction by clarifying how some lurkers take away from the community with their less than respectful trolling (especially when the info. is right there in front of them for the clicking and reading - lazy!)

 

It's like Bush's failed argument about not protecting the environment in fear of damaging the economy - without an environment, there would be no economy. :-?

 

Correct me if I am wrong?

 

I am sure there would be hell to pay if a "lurker" came on and made the same comments about a 1000+ poster.

I believe if a lurker started making comments then they would no longer be a lurker - and what would they say: I wish people who post stuff for me to lurk over would go away and stop posting? :-? I am not sure what "hell" there would be to pay, but I have yet to see this on any forum I have participated on in the last 15+ years of chatting online. By definition, it would be a case of biting the hand that feeds you. Lurkers need posters, not the other way around.

 

I believe in keeping it simple.

 

If you get a pm regarding a lady, simply refer them to their recommendations if they have any

 

and/or

 

Suggest they contact the lady directly.

 

Period.

 

Yes - I 100% agree with AngelaofOttawa! :grin:

 

...and therefore to keep it even simp-ler:

 

If a lady has any recommendations (which of course one would have looked for before ever considering spamming/PMing anyone else on the forum looking for the same info. which is already readily available to everyone), then simply do not PM members

 

and/or

 

If they have not contacted the lady directly themselves already.

 

Real simple - Exclamation point! ;)

[NotchJohnson 214123]

I may or may not have graduated from the "lurker" status I don't like putting people in classes anyway we are all equal right? The first eleven months I was on the board I had a grand total of 1 post so at the very least I have been there and done that.

 

I don't have a problem with the op of this thread I understand and appreciate his concerns

 

I do have a issue with the "lurker" post that I replied to I find this post and other "lurker" post (rants) by this person to be offensive and another form of negative posting which is against the spirit of the board.

 

There are two comments added to this post that I find offensive and negative.also.

T'storm: Those damn lurkers

BownChickaBown: Lazy Lurkers :P

 

I am sure there would be hell to pay if a "lurker" came on and made the same comments about a 1000+ poster.

 

If you feel like I was talking about you, this is how you feel. I personally think that if you have the amount of post as you do, you are not a lurker.

What gets me is that I'm a very easy going type of guy and when I visit the chat room it is to "chat". Every now and then which as not been very much this year when I do visit the chat room and say hello to everyone and I mean personally and I do not get a response back or they just log out after I talk to them, this is just plain rude.

 

My parents raised me to be honest, polite and fair, if someone says "hi" to me I will respond with "hello". If you do not wish to talk to anyone stay in your house and lock the door and disconnect the phone and the internet.

my 2 cents

[redmachine 1916]

Since you asked... IMHO, short answer: No.

Correct me if I am wrong?

 

Here is my complete statement you are replying to.

 

I have 9 ladies on my friends list 8 of these ladies I have had the great pleasure of meeting with at least once.

So despite my constant lurking I have had many wonderful experiences and have met 8 lovely ladies.

 

Correct me if I am wrong is this not what this site is all about?

 

 

So I will ask again! IYHO is good people having the opportunity to meet good people and enjoying each others company not what the site is about?.

 

Additional Comments:

If you feel like I was talking about you' date=' this is how you feel. I personally think that if you have the amount of post as you do, you are not a lurker.

What gets me is that I'm a very easy going type of guy and when I visit the chat room it is to "chat". Every now and then which as not been very much this year when I do visit the chat room and say hello to everyone and I mean personally and I do not get a response back or they just log out after I talk to them, this is just plain rude.

 

My parents raised me to be honest, polite and fair, if someone says "hi" to me I will respond with "hello". If you do not wish to talk to anyone stay in your house and lock the door and disconnect the phone and the internet.

my 2 cents[/quote']

 

 

T I know you were not talking about me personally. It is irrelevant if I am a lurker or not why do we have to put labels on people anyway? My first year on this board was spent as a lurker as some people call it during this time I never bothered anyone or sent anyone any unwanted pms. During this first year I read many threads and post or rants from some people about how bad lurkers were for the board. Please tell me how what I did or didn't do during this time was bad for the board.

 

The most commonly used word on this board is respect.

I respect everyones right to there own opinion.

I do not see coments like "dam lurkers" and "lazy lurkers" as respectful in any way.

[Emma Alexandra 123368]

aren't we all lurkers? Meaning that we come on here and read,look at pictures and so on...we may comment, we may not...the point is whether we post or not is up to us...

If your talking about the chat room then that's just a different story...when i go in there i say hi to everyone if they answer fine if they don't that's fine too..it only helps me weed out the people i would like to get to know...that's just my opinion..

[mod 135640]

Ok, I wasn't going to comment but I feel I should.

 

The so called 'Lurkers' are very important for a number of reasons.

1) By reading your posts they educate themselves on such things as

• Etiquette and how to treat the ladies
  
• laws
  
• breaking media and general public stereotypes of escorts (drugs, gangs, pimps, forced prostitution, std's, etc..)
  
• and much more...
  

2) Many 'lurkers' eventually become posters (You see accounts that look and read for months or years and eventually post) ... as yourself why?

• Your posts and contributions encouraged them to join
  
• Maybe they are shy
  
• They have not taken the leap yet but have been contemplating it. If your rude or not helpful you may convince them not to join in.
  
• They educated themselves and answered all the scary unknowns they may have before they book with the ladies for the first time.
  
• etc...
  

3) Many of the 'lurkers' read the ladies ads and book with the ladies (Many are first timers). This helps the site and our industry in a HUGE way!

 

• The ladies get lots of business from these guys...
  
• This brings MORE ladies to the site!
  
• Many are "First timers" who have questions about dating a SP. Without sites like this first timers may never book with a SP so your posts actually greatly help the industry. Many guys take months or even years to work up the courage to see a SP.
  

4) Traffic!!

• From a business end of things... This site is FREE for you all to use. Trust me, it is NOT free for us to run and the only thing that keeps this site going is the traffic it generates. We do not make much on banner ad sales and we do not charge the ladies to post ads here... instead the traffic from cerb funnels into escorts-canada (and other sites our company owns) and the traffic is high enough that it justifies the HUGE expense to run this site.
  
• It also greatly benefits the ladies as I mentioned above.
  

Basically...

 

1. Your posts = Content
   
2. Content = Search engine traffic and listings and making the site more popular
   
3. Search engine listings = new members finding us here
   
4. New members = both lurkers & new contributing members (Aka "More Traffic")
   
5. Traffic = $$$ (Both for the ladies and to our network of sites)
   
6. $$$ brings more ladies and every click that translates into traffic from cerb to escorts-canada and other sites our company owns increases our operating budget by a few cents. If we did not own cerb we would need to pay someone else for the same amount of traffic. It also brings more ladies to advertise on escorts-canada.
   

New people join into this business EVERY DAY (Both ladies and customers of the ladies). This industry has a very big turnover and we need to encourage new members to contribute... but we need to make them feel welcome as well. I agree the members who contribute and the ladies who are members here are the MOST important members on the site but please don't undersell the value the lurkers bring to the site.

 

I would encourage everyone to make the lurkers feel welcome and politely encourage them to join the conversations (when they are ready). Politely ask why they don't post - you may be surprised at the answers.

 

If you are rude, ignore them, discourage them from being members, or anything like that you are being counterproductive and actually hurting the site and the community.... you could be your own worst enemy as you could be discouraging a potential contributor of the site from participating here or making someone feel unwelcome and they just don't return (hurting potential business for the ladies as well).

 

Instead, if you have a second be a nice guy (or girl) and help them out.

 

That makes our community stronger and much more inviting. Maybe ask them why they have not posted yet.. be friendly about it. You may be surprised at the answer and you may be the helping hand they need to encourage them to contribute.

 

Not everyone is going to contribute... why?

The biggest reason I get for not contributing is that most are afraid of being "discovered" by a significant other!

 

Think about this ... you make a account on cerb to read the posts. If you lady finds out you have an account here but can't find any posts confirming you have seen any of the ladies... not that big of a deal as you could probably talk you way out of that....

 

BUT your significant other finds out you have an account here and she looks up posts you have made explaining all these wonderful ladies you have been with. Your not talking your way out of that one!

 

Another reason

...is that many still think that prostitution in Canada is illegal and don't want to leave a trail of posts or even have accounts on sites like this in fear that they are somehow breaking the law. We know this is far from true but the average person does NOT know this ... and with the help of this site they eventually learn that it's very much legal.

 

How many of you came here thinking prostitution (escorts) was illegal and the site made you realize it was actually legal in Canada? We have done polls on this and some people even after reading the info on this site still think we are a bunch of liars and are still convinced it is illegal. Seriously!

Trust me, MANY guys are afraid of these things. Guys ask me to close accounts DAILY.

 

Most of the lurkers would like to pitch in and join the conversations I am sure! Something is holding them back ... give it time and many will take the plunge.

 

Guy's who are lurking and reading this

You do not need to be afraid to contribute. You need to log out when done and delete history (or even better use the "Private Browser" feature in firefox or google chrome browser has a "incognito" browser window feature - this ensure no trace is left on your computer of your activities). Use your PDA even and remember to erase the recently visited sites. Cerb.ca is a easy domain name to remember! You can contribute and stay anonymous.

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

Thank you MOD!!!!!

I have recently been asking emailers contacting me from other sites to view my pics and reviews on CERB....Quite a few have joined as a result and I view this as good for me and my for fellow SP's. Has for the hobbiest's...one more point of view coming your way!

[alberta 222]

Well said Mod, everyone has their own reasons to be a member here and everyone contributes something.

[cat 262460]

I happen to love my "lurkers" from CERB. I know some of the frequent posters and a couple are guests but several of my favorite guests who see me very regularly are "lurkers" here. I happen to prefer a guest who doesn't run home to put up a recommendation for me. I appreciate that they respect my privacy. I don't think it is a crime for people to read and absorb the feel of our community. Many feel they have nothing to contribute and just enjoy the content. We all contribute to the extent we are comfortable and that is ok with me. Just my 2 cents...

 

cat

[Guest Ou**or**n]

Excellent post mod.

 

I think we need to understand the high level of caution that many people use when approaching items on the Internet that is of uncertain legality (to them) or could cause them grief in their personal lives.

 

I have friends that will not sign up with online Poker rooms despite the fact that in Canada its perfectly legal (unlike the US).

 

I have friends that will not sign-up with download services such as Rapidshare. This is a service that can be used for both legal and pirate file sharing.

 

For someone to even visit CERB anonymously is a big step. To actually create an account is a bigger step. To have an account and post anything at all is a bigger step. To post anything that states you have actually seen an SP is HUGE.

[NotchJohnson 214123]

I will try to tell a little story that happen to me on CERB and concerns many people here indirectly. I have received a PM from a new member(lurker) last fall asking me in my opinion who was the best lady to see in Ottawa. I explained that everyone has different preferences and that he should read the recommendations section for Ottawa.

He replied asking my opinion so I told him and he wanted more "options" from the SP so I guided him in the right direction. Now he makes 3 APPOINTMENTS with 3 different ladies at the same time and does not show up at any of them. I hear about it in chat and now I feel like shit giving this jerk my advice on girls to see.:ablow:

 

This is why I was mad at "lurkers" in the first place and promised myself to never help one out again. If you have some post on here and ask me for any advice I will be happy to help out to the best of my knowledge.

 

Thanks for your time

T

[mod 135640]

Most no-shows can be avoided if the lady insists on obtaining a phone number and calls back to confirm. In almost all NO-SHOWS the lady fails to obtain and call back the verification phone number. When the lady does get a verification number and gets a no-show many will POST the phone number in the SP ONLY area to warn the other ladies (and keeps a personal record of this so that if he tries it again with the same phone number he won't get her again).

 

Thankfully most of the lurkers are not like this... I think your grouping them into on big bad stereotype here. The ladies know how to limit the number of no-shows they get and if a Lurker account gets reported as being a no-show by a few of the ladies... I just BAN the IP from the server and the guys account is closed.

 

You got guys with 50+ posts doing no-shows as well at times (Usually they have a valid reason but not always)... don't let a few bad ones spoil it. For the most part the lurkers book lots of legit appointments with the ladies and they know they will get a few no-shows and assholes... it's part of the business unfortunately.

 

Good screening of callers can really limit this problem for the ladies and it most certainly was no fault of yours T'strom...

 

I am sure all the ladies would agree, continue to help the newbies and lurkers if they ask - I am sure appreciate it - and I am also sure that the good bookings far outweigh the bad.