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It's Moose season!

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Hunting story ....

 

well ??...I went downtown to the Cosmo ( years ago ) and there was this redhead .......

 

 

Joke ...

 

ha Joke ....

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Guest D***el B***e

A Professor was giving a lecture on "Involuntary Muscular Contractions" to his first year medical students.

 

Realizing that this was not the most riveting subject, the Professor decided to lighten the mood slightly.

 

He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said,

 

"Do you know what your ass hole is doing while you're having an orgasm???"

 

She replied, "Probably deer hunting with his buddies."

 

The Professor laughed so hard he could not continue with the class.

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Well I don't hunt but have a couple friends who do, and share venison and moose with me

But a couple jokes

 

Bubba

Bubba was at the police station explaining to the officer why his cousin shot him.

 

"We wuz havin' us a real good time drinkin'," he explained, "when my cousin Billy Bob picked up his rifle and asked us fellas if we wanna go a huntin'."

 

"Okay," then what happened?" the officer asked.

 

"That's when I stood up and said, 'Sure. I'm game'!"

 

Elk Hunting

 

Bubba and Jake chartered a plane with a pilot to drop them off in the wilds of Alaska for a week of elk hunting, just the same as they did the year before. When the pilot returned with the plane Bubba exclaimed joyfully to the pilot, "We had a great hunting trip! We bagged four elk!"

 

The pilot regretfully explained, "Unfortunately, our plane can only fly with the weight of two elk. You'll have to leave the other two behind."

 

Bubba and Jake were both infuriated and insistent. "We won't allow you to fly this plane out without all four elk," Jake demanded.

 

The eager to please pilot relented and the plane took off with the three of them and their four elk. About fifteen minutes into the flight the engine started to sputter, and within seconds they were hurtling to the ground.

 

Wearily arising from the wreckage, Bubba looked at Jake and wheezed, "Do you have any idea where we are?"

 

Jake, quite pleased with himself, replied, "Yes! We're about a mile from where we crashed last year."

 

...-

Oh stop groaning, I didn't say they were good jokes...what would you expect from a fisherman

 

RG

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Guest a**4*

I only got a calf tag this year and a buck tag waiting for bow season to start for deer it is good to see women out hunting

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RG - thanks. Somehow that joke seem familiar. Can't quite place it. Haha

 

Silverado - good thing. Make sure you let me know how you do.

 

Alb - deer is good. Did you hear about the kv valley deer cull? Every time deer season rolls around the deer move to Rothesay.

 

Daniel Boone - it took me a while to figure that one out. Haha.

 

https://www.google.ca/search?q=moose+images+cartoon&client=ms-android-samsung&sa=X&source=univ&biw=360&bih=592&tbm=isch&tbo=u&ei=N4kmVJjYCMe3yATFpYLoBQ&ved=0CC0Q7Ak#facrc=_&imgrc=IObfHEZwC6KzKM%253A%3BMIXQGb_Izj2QaM%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.themoosestore.com%252Fimages%252FJP_moose_spam.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.themoosestore.com%252Findex.php%253Fmain_page%253Dproduct_info%2526products_id%253D911%3B360%3B233

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RG doesn't hunt but always wanted to hang out with the big boys so Daniel Boone took him Moose hunting.

 

When they get to the woods, Daniel tells RG to sit by a tree and not make a sound while Daniel checks out a tree stand.

 

After he gets about a ways away, Daniel hears a frantic scream.

 

He rushes back to RG and yelled, "I thought I told you to be quiet!"

 

RG retorts, "Hey, I TRIED. When snakes crawled over me, I didn't make a sound.

 

When that bear was breathing down my neck, I didn't make a noise.

 

But when those two frickin chipmunks crawled up my pant legs and said, 'Should we take them with us or eat them here?' I screamed like a schoolgirl !!"

 

I'm A Goin fishin ! ;)

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RG doesn't hunt but always wanted to hang out with the big boys so Daniel Boone took him Moose hunting.

 

When they get to the woods, Daniel tells RG to sit by a tree and not make a sound while Daniel checks out a tree stand.

 

After he gets about a ways away, Daniel hears a frantic scream.

 

He rushes back to RG and yelled, "I thought I told you to be quiet!"

 

RG retorts, "Hey, I TRIED. When snakes crawled over me, I didn't make a sound.

 

When that bear was breathing down my neck, I didn't make a noise.

 

But when those two frickin chipmunks crawled up my pant legs and said, 'Should we take them with us or eat them here?' I screamed like a schoolgirl !!"

 

I'm A Goin fishin ! ;)

 

Now I understand why RG doesn't hunt. Thank your solving that mystery.

 

Are you going to get into trouble with the fat bastards club for divulging this bf only section information with the rest of us?

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