LisbethNova 5627 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 I have heard from a few lovely gents that they have experienced racism from providers. Some who were asked straight up what race they were and when they answered, they were flat out rejected.. I found this quite shocking.. but I am wondering how many clients have experienced this? Also, a question for the providers is whether you have a preference for particular races... I guess it's a tough question, but I actually have read on some provider websites, -"no blacks and no indian". I am just curious how common this is??? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 This subject has been extensively discussed before, always heated, apparently with no right answer http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=181140&highlight=blacks http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=151618 Some things to keep in mind 1. A lady has the absolute right to choose who she is intimate with, irrespective of a clients race, creed, colour, religion, age, body size, hair/lack of it etc etc etc 2. Forcing a SP to be sexually intimate with a man she does not wish to be with is akin to a sexual assault. Doesn't no mean no...even if the reason is skin colour 3. Often ladies may have a BF/SO (some who may not know their GF/SO is an SP) who is for lack of a better phrase, part of a small ethnic group in her city, and seeing someone of the same ethnic group as a client could publically expose her to that small community where her profession as an SP could be discovered. Racism may not be the reason, it may be because of discretion and anonymity. 4. Yes maybe racism too. Not saying it doesn't happen. But that said what man would really want to see a woman who doesn't want to see him. There are many beautiful women out there that aren't racist and would love to spend time with a respectful gentleman of any ethnicity. That's just off the top of my head. I'll guarantee this thread will end up heated. I'm already feeling uncomfortable posting RG 21 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kmwq 5477 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 It's not racism, it's personal preference. I choose the ladies that I want to spend time with and certain skin colours do not get my attention because it does not turn me on. Does that make me a racist? I don't believe so, at least I hope not. 9 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phaedrus 209521 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 Honestly, I have no idea how common it is. There are a very few providers who put restrictions in their ads; there are a larger number who explicitly state that they don't discriminate based on race. As RG said, all providers have the same right as anyone else to reject anyone they don't want to get it on with, no matter how good or bad their reasons may be. But clients decide who to see or not see for all sorts of reasons, and there are probably quite a lot of us who find overt racism to be rather distasteful... 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andee 220524 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 It's not racism. It's personal preference for WHATEVER reason. This topic has been discussed before on cerb, most notably: http://cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=181140&highlight=blacks I am in no way speaking for everyone, but I have met some SPs who are will not see black clients, tell me the reason for doing so is their past/present boyfriends or handlers were black men and they don't see clients of the same race they date. I knew an Sp who was of another ethnicity who would not see clients of that ethnic group because she did not want to run into anyone she might know from her community. Sps provide an intimate service and are when it comes to our bodies, it's our rules. And we shouldn't have to explain ourselves to anyone. 10 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VedaSloan 119179 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 Not gonna touch this one. I've said my piece in previous threads. 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Boomer 33202 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 I'd like to reinforce the earlier comments. This isn't always an easy job, and has many inherent risks, so women have every right to chose who they offer such an intimate service. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest D***el B***e Report post Posted October 30, 2014 Interesting thread. I know it's been discussed at length and as RG mentioned there is no right answer. There may be prejudice but then again that's only one of the possible answers. I was talking to a lady at the office very recently in the aftermath of the Ottawa shooting and she was mentioning that she doesn't have a racist bone in her body but in the same breath she was saying that quite often these terror attacks originate with the same ideological groups. Does that make her a racist? I dont think so. I have my preferences as well when it comes to my sexual pleasure, there are certain groups, skin color, or body size that don't appeal to me and, as a hobbyist, it's my right, my choice, my money. I also don't have an issue with a provider specifically mentioning she doesn't see certain people. As a provider, it's her right, her choice, her body. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
50 Shades Raven 31380 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 I do not believe its racism, I do believe its preference, for whatever reason. I can certainly understand the ethnicity backgrounds and not wanting to run into someone 'accidentally' from ones own ethnic background in a small community of that ethnicity. It makes perfect sense to me. Providers that do not wish to see gentlemen from any particular ethnic group, no matter which group that may be, do most certainly have the right to choose. After all, gentlemen that seek our services as providers, are certainly free to not choose any one of us due to our ethnic background, or hair color, or physical appearance. If a provider is being rude about about it, then that is a discussion between the provider and gentleman, or actually, just don't communicate with that particular provider. Rudeness is not tolerated well in this business, in any form, from either provider nor client. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spud271 47779 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 It's most likely personal preference or some other personal reason. It's very hard to say, but I think RG pretty much laid out all the likely case scenarios. It is the woman's right to choose who she sleeps with and not my position to judge. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fr33yay0 1172 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 I was asked, recently as last week. I brought up the nerve to ask the SP why (out of curiosity) I am Caucasian... and she said that she's had some nightmare experiences with some races and has chosen not to service those races. Is that racist?! I don't know... maybe. I just know that some SP's even go the extra step in their ADS to exclude certain races. Cheers, E. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Amber Rose 19012 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 Unless the lady is refusing them for reasons such as not wanting to run into people from the same group, etc. then it is racism. Plain and simple, nothing else around it. It may be a "preference", but it's a racist preference. This article sums it up nicely: http://everydayfeminism.com/2013/11/racial-preferences-are-racist/ Out of curiosity, has anyone seen any SP's advertising "No White Guys"? Probably not. With all that said, I do agree the SP's have every right to pick and choose who they see and should never feel pressured to see someone they aren't comfortable with. (not trying to start a new discussion, I just feel strongly on the subject matter) Posted via Mobile Device 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisbethNova 5627 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 Sorry I have not been on this board very long to have read every thread and this was an issue that was brought up to me recently. I have only had positive experiences with various races... I think I judge more on how someone writes to me rather their race. Whether they be Indian, Asian, black or white I have a certain standard to how I am approached in an email. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dread pirate roberts 4036 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 I can sense my opinion will be unpopular. What if a restaurant says "we won't serve Black people"? What if a bank says "we don't accept Aboriginal clients"? What if a movie theatre says "we don't sell tickets to Jews"? In none of those cases would we say "that's just personal preference, they can deal with who they want". In fact we have specifically passed laws called Human Rights Act which prohibit anyone providing a service from claiming to provide those services based on a personal preference where it relates to race, or colour, or ethnic origin, and so on. I'm perfectly willing to agree that the services a "service provider" in this business provides are different from most, but not so different that this general rule does not apply. And sure, there are exceptions - a church is entitled to insist that its priest be Catholic, its ok to have both boys and girls soccer teams - but I don't see why there would be an exception here. It's true, a person who is simply choosing sexual partners is absolutely free to indulge whatever private opinions they might have. If CERB were a dating site, there'd be no issue whatsoever. But when someone has entered into a business, rather than personally seeking pleasure, well, then yes, different rules apply - the ones that apply to anyone engaged in business. It is extraordinarily unlikely anyone would ever make a Human Rights Act complaint about this, but that doesn't mean it isn't wrong. I have seen ads which say things like "I don't want any drama, so no Arabs or Indians". Personally I cross those SPs off my list, though I'm neither Arab nor Indian, just as I would refuse to frequent any other business which discriminates unlawfully. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VictoriaJolie 64127 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 I have heard from a few lovely gents that they have experienced racism from providers. Some who were asked straight up what race they were and when they answered, they were flat out rejected.. I found this quite shocking.. but I am wondering how many clients have experienced this? Also, a question for the providers is whether you have a preference for particular races... I guess it's a tough question, but I actually have read on some provider websites, -"no blacks and no indian". I am just curious how common this is??? I have work in this industry close to a decade I have seen some ladies in south clearly state no black...it's really hard to describe each situation I don't discriminate I see all background however recently I start to ask ethnicity and age to have a better sense of who I deal with I have canceled in middle of the session someone that was way too aggressive with a large equipment to be call racist..As funny as it sound I have date several guys of his ethnicity Knowing sometime ethnicity help me to be prepare to understand some behaviors You know as shocking as it can be fir some it's a lady preference ..some ladies choose to not see overweight men under 25 men.. As much as it sound like racism some ladies have a problem service black,Indian,Arab I don't .. However I can recognize that some of different nationality not all have different smell behaviors etc I personally decide to judge on each different person individually I see obese handicap person but I do expect them to be forward as different issue can arise.. As for asking ethnicity or age it just help me to know a bit what to expect ..of course by generalizing Lisbeth i know it sad that some escorts refuse a client base on his color but it's her decision her body and probably her lost.. I have met ladies that won't see different ethnicity yet they have a partner of different ethnicity .. I personally only discriminate arrogant not nice guys lol 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cara Silver 32412 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 I find that men from certain countries, particularly new immigrants from those certain countries, were not raised in a culture in which women are equal or highly valued or treated delicately. Which makes the job tougher than it already is. Ladies' screening processes are none of anybody's business, whether those screening processes would be deemed 'racist' or not by the general public. 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 And, the last time I checked, the sps are not waiting tables at a restaurant, where their contact with people is limited to talking to them, and putting a plate of food down in front of them. There isn't going to be human rights committees started up in order to force sps to service everyone who contacts them, because that is procuring/coercion/trafficking and will remain against the laws. So complain about it in an ad, or as an sp's particular policy all you wish, it won't get you in the door to see her if she has chosen this path. I happen to think that assuming an sp is racist because she has any such policy is prejudging her without having the knowledge or understanding of why she has the policy. 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dread pirate roberts 4036 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 "I happen to think that assuming an sp is racist because she has any such policy is prejudging her without having the knowledge or understanding of why she has the policy." Let me clarify: I did not say I assume any SP with such a policy is racist, nor that any policy about race is racist. I suggested that it would violate the Human Rights Act, which is a different thing. Some people think "I hate Blacks and think they are all inferior, so I won't let them in my bar" - those people are racist. Other people might think "personally I don't have any problem with Blacks but I will lose other customers in my bar if I let Blacks in" - those people are not racist. But from the point of view of someone Black, it doesn't make any difference whether we can or should attach the label "racist" or not - they aren't allowed in the bar either way, so they are denied the service. Either one of those bar owners would be violating the Human Rights Act. So, yes, certainly, someone who thinks "I won't take clients from my ethnic group because that makes it too likely I will meet someone I know" - absolutely NOT a racist attitude. Other examples have been offered where people are acting on criteria which should not be described as racist. But if they result in refusing to provide service because of race or religion or whatever, it would violate the Human Rights Act. Will anyone complain? No, of course not, as I said - but not because they couldn't. If someone did complain, would the Human Rights Commission say "you must have sex with this person"? Again, no, of course not, but they could order something else, like paying money to the person who complained, or apologizing, or something like that. And someone who, as in the ad I quoted, says "I don't like drama so no Arabs or Indians" - well, that does to me sound like saying "I am making negative assumptions about what you will be like based only on your race", and so that particular policy, yes, that's racist. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
xxxAxxx 21016 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 (edited) So, yes, certainly, someone who thinks "I won't take clients from my ethnic group because that makes it too likely I will meet someone I know" - absolutely NOT a racist attitude. Other examples have been offered where people are acting on criteria which should not be described as racist. But if they result in refusing to provide service because of race or religion or whatever, it would violate the Human Rights Act. Will anyone complain? No, of course not, as I said - but not because they couldn't. It's true, a person who is simply choosing sexual partners is absolutely free to indulge whatever private opinions they might have. If CERB were a dating site, there'd be no issue whatsoever. But when someone has entered into a business, rather than personally seeking pleasure, well, then yes, different rules apply - the ones that apply to anyone engaged in business. It is extraordinarily unlikely anyone would ever make a Human Rights Act complaint about this, but that doesn't mean it isn't wrong. Just so I am clear, forcing a woman to sleep with someone she doesn't want to sleep with (her being racist or not is irrelevant here) is not a violation of human rights, but saying no to someone is? I can just imagine how that conversation would go.... Hobbyists: "Hi, I'd like to file a complaint against _______ for not allowing me to pay her for sexual services" Human Rights Advocacy : "(laughing) ... Unfortunately sir, offering to pay her is not a suitable reason for anyone to force her into sleeping with you. It is her basic human right to deny you her body. (more laughing) Have a nice day Sir" *click* I have every right to say no to anyone for ANY reason, even if those reasons are racist! (Please note: I am not racist, I do not have race requirements, but these comments have ignited a fire inside me) I think you need to educate yourself more on human rights my dear. Sure, racism sucks. But what sucks even worse is ANYONE being forced into SEXUAL ACTS with just anyone and everyone because you feel it's violating the buyer's rights when a seller is selective. NO. Truly, if you are turned away for ANY reason (racism or others), well that's just too F-ing bad! Move onto another provider, lord knows we aren't exactly a rare commodity. But you want me to give myself, my all, my body and soul to a person who perhaps is revolting to me? Wow. What you suggest is that I do not have any human rights, only you do... Maybe I should complain to Costco for only letting their club members buy merchandise. Maybe they'll pay me for my complaint. They are after all violating my human rights, according to you. And what are these rules of business that EVERYONE needs to follow exactly? Guess I should also complain about every shopping mall in North America who has a "NO shoes, No shirt - NO SERVICE!" rule as well. I mean, frigg, the hotdog stand guy sells me food without my wearing shoes, why doesn't every "business" ??? Ugh. You have to accept that the particular merchandise we sell cannot simply be offered to anyone with a wallet. Many different industries have standards, rules & laws specific to that industry, why should this be any different? Your opinion on this matter disgusts me. That is all. If someone did complain, would the Human Rights Commission say "you must have sex with this person"? Again, no, of course not, but they could order something else, like paying money to the person who complained, or apologizing, or something like that. The apology, sure. "I'm sorry but some of your details are on my "black list" and I cannot see you" There, apology. BUT PAYING MONEY TO THE PERSON WHO COMPLAINED? SERIOUSLY?!?! * raised eyebrow * Edited October 30, 2014 by xxxAxxx 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
whatsup 11893 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 What it all boils down to is the providers comfort zone and preference. 6 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cinelli 22184 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 A quick anecdote from my workplace. Three years ago we hired a guy with journeyman skills and papers from a foreign country. He came under a refugee program. He seemed like a pretty decent guy, a good worker and sociable. A week into his employment a female supervisor asked him to do something. I was standing next to him and he said to me, right in front of her, "I'm not taking orders from a woman." No ifs ands or buts. I tried to smooth things over but he was so adamant we ended up having to fire him. He was not willing to compromise and preferred being unemployed to taking orders from a woman. So how many other guys like that are out there? If any of the ladies on here have to deal with guys like him they have my sympathy. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
xxxAxxx 21016 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 (edited) For the record, I myself have met Caucasian, Canadian-born men who also treat women this way. Stereotyping races is the exact definition of racism and surely has no place on the forum. Edited October 31, 2014 by xxxAxxx 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Exotic Touch Danielle 31728 Report post Posted October 30, 2014 We all have our own personal.preferences and have every right to those In some instances maybe it is.racism and what really can.you do...its alive and out there It.could.be many reasons why.a provider will ask your race Could be because she prefers a certain race Could be because.she.dates only a.certain race and doesnt want to.run.into someone she may know on a personal level Only the lady knows why I.personally like to see all gentlemen race is not an issue BUT age is for me I prefer not to date.younger than 25.because I feel I.connect better with.older gents and I.enjoy our time together and also I have a son that is 20 and it wouldn't feel right to me regardless if I am.being paid for my time 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andee 220524 Report post Posted October 31, 2014 Just like the other thread on this topic probably time to close this thread. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dread pirate roberts 4036 Report post Posted October 31, 2014 I know I feel like someone who was asked what the speed limit is, answered, then got jumped on by people saying "how dare you tell me how fast to drive!!!" 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites