Guest Cr**gCa***ng Report post Posted November 8, 2014 To whom it may concern: Please be advised that due to the new legislation formerly known as Bill C-36, I am now officially celibate and no longer engage in any sexual or intimate practises with anyone whatsoever. I have entered into a totally monogamous relationship with myself so that I am in keeping with the law of the land and am conforming to all moral guidelines. If and when I contact anyone anywhere or anytime no sexual services are being requested in exchange for money or for other consideration. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Boomer 33202 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 To whom it may concern: Please be advised that due to the new legislation formerly known as Bill C-36, I am now officially celibate and no longer engage in any sexual or intimate practises with anyone whatsoever. I have entered into a totally monogamous relationship with myself so that I am in keeping with the law of the land and am conforming to all moral guidelines. If and when I contact anyone anywhere or anytime no sexual services are being requested in exchange for money or for other consideration. I was so impressed by your example, that I've decided to also dedicate myself to God and a religious life. 7 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Cr**gCa***ng Report post Posted November 8, 2014 I was so impressed by your example, that I've decided to also dedicate myself to God and a religious life. Amen brother!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
xxxAxxx 21016 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 (edited) I would join the celibacy party except that it wouldn't take long for me to start foaming at the mouth... Wait....nevermind, that's just drool. Edited November 8, 2014 by xxxAxxx typo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 I was so impressed by your example, that I've decided to also dedicate myself to God and a religious life. Not just God and a religious life, but since it was MacKay and the CPC that made me see the error of my ways, I'm going to join the conservative party:icon_rolleyes: RG :-) 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lisaoftoronto 628 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 celebate is that like celery? well i guess they gonna have to lock me up & feed me free rent yey 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NotchJohnson 214123 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 I was so impressed by your example, that I've decided to also dedicate myself to God and a religious life. I want to join this cult, sounds amazing....wait....can we still masturbate? 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Royalfun 55449 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 I'm in ! Maybe we should create the Fraternity of Holy Perveted ! And we should worship Life and celebrate the Goddess of Fertility, Pleasure and Freedom. Since Harper promoted the freedom of religion in China, I'm sure he will protect it in our own country. Donation accepted. lol 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LeeRichards 177238 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 I want to join this cult, sounds amazing....wait....can we still masturbate? I suspect case lot lotion and Kleenex sale may be on the rise ? ;) And I wish I had shares in the Hitachi company and Duracell I suppose I myself am torn between joining the Fat Bastard celibacy camp for perverts ? Sponsored by Budweiser . Or having myself cryogenically frozen for 30 Frickin years ? 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mec88 331 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 A secret society of pervs, I'm in if we can invite some of the ladies. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ice4fun 78407 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 I only wish that Harpers mother had taken a vow of celibacy and stuck to it... i find it somewhat funny that a guy so adamantly against abortion is more like the poster child for it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gabriella Laurence 301887 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 (edited) I have also decided to turn in my abusive pimp, stop prostituting myself for my next fix, go to rehab, and join the dinosaur era by becoming a delusional extreme feminist anti myself! I will even stop having sex and promise not to masturbate anymore! Wow, I can't wait to become a real woman, a respectable one at that, with great values and morals, and not a helpless victim anymore! There might be a future for me, after-all! Thinking of it, I might even start going to church every Sunday!!! CPC, thank you so much for changing my life for the better! I don't know what I would've done without you! Truly a life saver! .........- In case anyone reads this and thinks I'm being serious, this post is 100% sarcastic and not real lol Edited November 8, 2014 by Ga*****la L****nce typo 6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 I have also decided to turn in my abusive pimp, stop prostituting myself for my next fix, go to rehab, and join the dinosaur era by becoming a delusional extreme feminist anti myself! I will even stop having sex and promise not to masturbate anymore! Wow, I can't wait to become a real women, a respectable one at that, with great values and morals, and not a helpless victim anymore! There might be a future for me, after-all! Thinking of it, I might even start going to church every Sunday!!! CPC, thank you so much for changing my life for the better! I don't know what I would've done without you! Truly a life saver! .........- In case anyone reads this and thinks I'm being serious, this post is 100% sarcastic and not real lol OMG I'm relieved...for a second I thought I was going to have to get a divorce from my (virtual) wifey. Gawd what does that say about conservative family values, their laws leading to (virtual) marital break-ups Signed (virtual) Hubby Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bewlayb 7480 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 I want to join this cult, sounds amazing....wait....can we still masturbate? Sure. Just as long as no money exchanges hands. Sounds like the end of "pocket pool" to me, particularly if you're in the habit of carrying loose change. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malika Fantasy 144625 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 Guys. You don't need to create a new cult. It already exist. It's call being Wiccan. A way to celebrate whatever god you choose is by having sex. So now we are just all celebrating gods and goddesses together 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest *Ste***cque** Report post Posted November 8, 2014 Celibacy? I'm in!!! Additional Comments: ... I'm out! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nicolette Vaughn 294340 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 Stephen Harper and Peter Mackay are my new heroes! NOT!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cara Silver 32412 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 Attention: Masturbation is now illegal. If you must make physical contact with the opposite sex please do so in the form of a handshake. *Note: All handshakes must be pre-approved by Overlord Harper. :) 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 Stephen Harper and Peter Mackay are my new heroes! NOT!!!!!! Strange the resemblance PM and SH have to the Emperor and Darth Vader...and both backed up by their Imperial Storm Troopers. RG 5 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest N***he**Ont**y Report post Posted November 8, 2014 Thanks to the Temple Of The Conservative Party of Canada an off shoot of the the Reformist Good Mom And Apple Pie Circa 1955 Good Feeling Church I have joined an program of Celibacy while I am in Millhaven doing Bill C36 time. I am known as # 12367872 there. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
xxxAxxx 21016 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 I happily await the day that the Conservatives pull their heads out of their asses and their noses out of our beds! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mrgreen760 37785 Report post Posted November 8, 2014 Attention: Masturbation is now illegal. If you must make physical contact with the opposite sex please do so in the form of a handshake. *Note: All handshakes must be pre-approved by Overlord Harper. :) I do know some pretty interesting handshakes ;) Peace MG 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted November 9, 2014 I happily await the day that the Conservatives pull their heads out of their asses and their noses out of our beds! That'll be the next federal election when we can kick them out of office Remember this at election time RG 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rounding Third 9568 Report post Posted November 9, 2014 Oh yes Brothers, I too have been liberated by our new leader Pete, a fellow Maritimer (and I hasten to add not from NB but another Maritime province) who is leading us away from the wickedness of pervertedness. For six years now I have been visiting with CERB ladies not realizing that my perverted ways were harming them so much that they need protection from me. Oh yes, how happy I am to return to the natural world under the glories of C-36, away form pervertedness. When I visit with Cerb ladies in the future i will spend my time telling them of how I have seen the light thanks to Pete. So glad to be in the natural world..lets see what is the news of the day?....Oh, a Canadian celebrety slugs women, and .. sexual harassment on Parliament hill... Hey Pete, want to run that by me once again why I am the pervert! 6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
peacectryguy 12547 Report post Posted November 9, 2014 Can we get a giant AMEN from the congregation. :icon_lol: Such a relief that we are all being "saved" from our perverted ways and exploitation. Oh, you poor dears, had I only known that I was causing you to be drug dependent and abused by pimps and trafficked into slavery and all that. I would have mended my ways. Now, wtf am I supposed to do with the daily "morning wood"? Jebus, enlighten me please. :icon_wink: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites