Jump to content

Just for Laughs - Threads that would NEVER be posted on CERB

Recommended Posts

As I sit not able to sleep, thought I would lighten things up with.

 

I was imagining:handjob: topics for threads that would NEVER be posted on CERB but nonetheless would be funny to consider:mrgreen:.

 

Here's what my demented imagination:twisted: came up with for some topics:

 

Help - I Need Someone - Anyone - to write me a Recommendation

 

CERB Biggest Dick Award!

 

Attention Ladies: I Need to Get Laid TODAY. Can Someone Help Out Until I Get Paid on Friday

 

Donations Now Being Collected Towards Celebrating "Get the MOD Laid Day"

 

Today Only - All Calls Free Because I'm Just Soooo Horny

 

SP Accepting Appointments Only From Guys Who Look Like Sean Connery

 

Attention Ladies: When You See How Good Looking I am, You'll Want to Pay Me

 

New Social Club: Lurkers who Never Book, Just Gawk at the Pictures and Waste Ladies' Time in Chat and By E-mail

:sm185:

Okay...now that I've totally embarassed myself:bowdown:, I know there are some other twisted minds out there...(Old Dog, I'm counting on you)....:smileysmontrefesse:

 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest f***2f***

"A Big Thank You to all those No Show Artists out there! Cause I'm saving myself for a Real Man!":butt:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Funny list you have there!

 

I don't think you'll ever see that on Cerb: "Need to get laid, now accepting quotes from SP's and lowest bid will be contacted later today!"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest s******ecan****

-Looking for an SP who has an Internet Connection so I can surf porn and jack off in safety....willing to negotiate rates.

 

- Seeking SP with strap on who bears resemblance to Stephen Harper (or has mask) to help satisfy my "get screwed by the taxman" fetish

 

- Question for the ladies - How many of you accept post-dated cheques?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"Donations Now Being Collected Towards Celebrating "Get the MOD Laid Day""

hey wait...this might not be such a bad idea............hehehehehe

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

CERB......smallest dick award........

 

Quote antlerman's intelligent posts...........

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Now Collecting Donations to Buy Antlerman Kleenex

 

Worst Hairy Butt Crack Award

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Award entitled...

"Best DATY, a legend in my own mind"

 

And before I get ragged on...no I am not talking about anyone in particular!!! Just for fun; remember?

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest ***s

xxx Loose West End Nymph xxx

 

Friday Father/Son Family Special, Call for details.

 

Ask me about my Senior discount -Enhancers available for you wild ones!

 

 

 

Ya I know ... I'm weird lol - but could you imagine!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

New Service: Pay-as-You Go: $5 a minute.

 

Secrets to Passing "John" School.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

great prices...no service......just pay me.......

 

 

crap...that sounds like my ex.........

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"Ladies: I'm ready NOW, first one here wins...aaaaand GO!"

 

"Best ways to get BJ-milage that isn't offered by a lady at a SC?"

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The LAZIEST NIPPLE AWARD GOES TO- _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _!:shock:

 

While I'm whacking

"Would you like some special sauce on top on those buns? "

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

every man's dream revealed......"how to orgasm in less than 30 seconds"

 

from the article "wham Bam"

written by Tank U. Mam

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Skankiest Panties Award

 

The Award for the Ad with the most typos goes to....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest S***e

Hilarious, but rings true to so many!

 

"A Big Thank You to all those No Show Artists out there! Cause I'm saving myself for a Real Man!":butt:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was worried about this thread when I first saw it but it has turned out to be very entertaining. I could just cut and paste ads from CL here with all the photos of porn stars and famous actresses.

 

P.S. Antlerman... Don't need help but thanks!!! .... and Angela's reply "Now Collecting Donations to Buy Antlerman Kleenex" That is funny shit!! I laughed out loud at that and I think a little bit of my coffee went up my nose! ... Where is my kleenex?

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Between power outages...this has been a hilarious afternoon! Keep up the good work everyone! Thanks Ange for the entertainment!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, please sign in.
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...