Andee 220524 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 As I sit not able to sleep, thought I would lighten things up with. I was imagining:handjob: topics for threads that would NEVER be posted on CERB but nonetheless would be funny to consider:mrgreen:. Here's what my demented imagination:twisted: came up with for some topics: Help - I Need Someone - Anyone - to write me a Recommendation CERB Biggest Dick Award! Attention Ladies: I Need to Get Laid TODAY. Can Someone Help Out Until I Get Paid on Friday Donations Now Being Collected Towards Celebrating "Get the MOD Laid Day" Today Only - All Calls Free Because I'm Just Soooo Horny SP Accepting Appointments Only From Guys Who Look Like Sean Connery Attention Ladies: When You See How Good Looking I am, You'll Want to Pay Me New Social Club: Lurkers who Never Book, Just Gawk at the Pictures and Waste Ladies' Time in Chat and By E-mail :sm185: Okay...now that I've totally embarassed myself:bowdown:, I know there are some other twisted minds out there...(Old Dog, I'm counting on you)....:smileysmontrefesse: 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest f***2f*** Report post Posted May 26, 2010 "A Big Thank You to all those No Show Artists out there! Cause I'm saving myself for a Real Man!":butt: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Antoine 502 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 ROTFLOL Angela. Really funny. It's going to be hard to top, I'll have to give it some thought. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Stormzzz 233 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 Funny list you have there! I don't think you'll ever see that on Cerb: "Need to get laid, now accepting quotes from SP's and lowest bid will be contacted later today!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest s******ecan**** Report post Posted May 26, 2010 -Looking for an SP who has an Internet Connection so I can surf porn and jack off in safety....willing to negotiate rates. - Seeking SP with strap on who bears resemblance to Stephen Harper (or has mask) to help satisfy my "get screwed by the taxman" fetish - Question for the ladies - How many of you accept post-dated cheques? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 "Donations Now Being Collected Towards Celebrating "Get the MOD Laid Day"" hey wait...this might not be such a bad idea............hehehehehe Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annessa 22743 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 this are all hillarious! gonna have to put my thinking cap on now to top these! lol Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 CERB......smallest dick award........ Quote antlerman's intelligent posts........... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andee 220524 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 Now Collecting Donations to Buy Antlerman Kleenex Worst Hairy Butt Crack Award Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Meg O'Ryan 266444 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 Award entitled... "Best DATY, a legend in my own mind" And before I get ragged on...no I am not talking about anyone in particular!!! Just for fun; remember? 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nicolette Vaughn 294340 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 Attention Ladies: FREE FACIAL!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mister C 1725 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 If you're under 10" don't bother contacting me. You're too small for me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest ***s Report post Posted May 26, 2010 xxx Loose West End Nymph xxx Friday Father/Son Family Special, Call for details. Ask me about my Senior discount -Enhancers available for you wild ones! Ya I know ... I'm weird lol - but could you imagine! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andee 220524 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 New Service: Pay-as-You Go: $5 a minute. Secrets to Passing "John" School. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 great prices...no service......just pay me....... crap...that sounds like my ex......... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annessa 22743 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 "Ladies: I'm ready NOW, first one here wins...aaaaand GO!" "Best ways to get BJ-milage that isn't offered by a lady at a SC?" 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A***** A***** 510 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 LMAO!!! I am laughing so hard, I don't have any ideas!!!:boobies: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PistolPete 61421 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 The LAZIEST NIPPLE AWARD GOES TO- _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _!:shock: While I'm whacking "Would you like some special sauce on top on those buns? " Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Meg O'Ryan 266444 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 Cum on over to the ho-down...Cowboy hats and boots extra discount! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 every man's dream revealed......"how to orgasm in less than 30 seconds" from the article "wham Bam" written by Tank U. Mam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andee 220524 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 Skankiest Panties Award The Award for the Ad with the most typos goes to.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest S***e Report post Posted May 26, 2010 Hilarious, but rings true to so many! "A Big Thank You to all those No Show Artists out there! Cause I'm saving myself for a Real Man!":butt: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mod 135640 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 I was worried about this thread when I first saw it but it has turned out to be very entertaining. I could just cut and paste ads from CL here with all the photos of porn stars and famous actresses. P.S. Antlerman... Don't need help but thanks!!! .... and Angela's reply "Now Collecting Donations to Buy Antlerman Kleenex" That is funny shit!! I laughed out loud at that and I think a little bit of my coffee went up my nose! ... Where is my kleenex? 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PistolPete 61421 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 antlerman stole them all:mrgreen: ... Where is my kleenex? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Meg O'Ryan 266444 Report post Posted May 26, 2010 Between power outages...this has been a hilarious afternoon! Keep up the good work everyone! Thanks Ange for the entertainment! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
