How do you view hobbying - A party with a guest or pay for sex

[Carrie Moon 68826]

Actually hun.. the way you used ''Dear''.. it is condescending... esp when you know our names

 

which is why my last response to you on here was sarcastic.

[Capital Hunter 18263]

My apology Carrie and Annessa. I was not aware of that (in Englang husbands and wives call each other dear or darling). So, I assume it is okay if I say hun?? or prefer to call your names as I did in this post.

 

I can see why it could be regarded offensive as the word is reserved for friends and could be offensive if used on strangers. So, me assuming that someone I have never met is a friend and address her like so, may be offensive. I assume all cerbites are friends, afterall this is a friendly board as I am sure we all agree and that was why i used the word "dear".

 

ps - I will remove references to "dear" from my posts.

[Carrie Moon 68826]

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/dear

 

see #12//an affectionate or familiar term of address (sometimes offensive when used to a stranger, subordinate, etc.) '

 

yup.. hun is okay. at least by me!

[PistolPete 61421]

Mmmmm, 77 posts 8 pages and the title was....

"How do you view hobbying - A party with a guest or pay for sex "

 

I think we answered that..did we not? or more around and around we go? anyways bottom line is this below....currency exchanged for intimacy,friendship,companionship,making love and having fun = TIME

Of course times a few of them = A very nice time,even if you are watching TV and cuddling and hugging.

 

A quote....

“Time is more valuable than money. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time.”

 

Or how about a some of these

[Old Dog 179138]

Confusion sets in....

 

If I take my accountant out for ice cream, do I still get to deduct it as an expense or is the accountant going to bill me for companionship plus the processing fee of calculating entertainment expenditures even if they don't dance in my living room?

 

Does it matter if my accountant has a penis and didn't order ice cream but just loved the ambiance of Baskin Robbins?

[PistolPete 61421]

Confusion sets in....

 

If I take my accountant out for ice cream, do I still get to deduct it as an expense or is the accountant going to bill me for companionship plus the processing fee of calculating entertainment expenditures even if they don't dance in my living room?

 

Does it matter if my accountant has a penis and didn't order ice cream but just loved the ambiance of Baskin Robbins?

 

LMAO Old Dog!

 

Old Dog are you Sitting down with your accountant??? after ice cream?

[Annessa 22743]

LMAO Old Dog!

 

Old Dog are you Sitting down with your accountant??? after ice cream?

 

 

LOL....oh geez! tee hee x 1000

[Old Dog 179138]

Well.... he is a good dancer... but he hasn't been the same since he lost all of his hair...

 

[PistolPete 61421]

Old Dog you crack me up pal! Thanks I enjoy laughter! It is good for the soul!

[Guest s******ecan****]

Well.... he is a good dancer... but he hasn't been the same since he lost all of his hair...

 

 

With abs and legs like that you should be able to overlook the lack of hair.

[ottanon 2930]

No braggin, but I am amazed at what really goes on at strip clubs. It wasn't until my 40's that I found much more available in strip clubs. I think that many don't experience it due to their age. Just as many Sp's prefer older gentlemen I think that was goes on in the clubs also depends on your age. I can assure that alot of action is going on in the CR's, and I am no Romeo or particularly good looking.

 

 

There is a lot of contact at strip clubs' date=' which is legal, but surprisingly not much sex going on in or outside the club. I think a lot of guys like to brag and that can skew what is actually going on.[/quote']

[labialover 690]

No braggin, but I am amazed at what really goes on at strip clubs. It wasn't until my 40's that I found much more available in strip clubs. I think that many don't experience it due to their age. Just as many Sp's prefer older gentlemen I think that was goes on in the clubs also depends on your age. I can assure that alot of action is going on in the CR's, and I am no Romeo or particularly good looking.

 

You got that rite! I've been offered stuff in the last couple of months termed as "extras" that I just can't believe. The prices are insane but the activities are wide open. Don't know if its a new thing but its interesting. May have something to do with age as quoted above, don't really know cause I'm no stud and pushing 60.

[Old Dog 179138]

With abs and legs like that you should be able to overlook the lack of hair.

 

Scott... the legs and abs are great, but I don't trust his accounting methods. This "one for you, two for me" business is getting suspicious. That and the fact that he always wants to cuddle after a row of figures...

 

I told him I am straight, but he keeps promising a better return on my investments and well... you know those legs of his....

[Guest O***wa**W]

 

I don't hire SPs OutForFun!!!!. I invite the ladies to be guests in my house and she is treated like one not like an employee lol. In my PM/email I communicate with them the fact that they are invited as guests (i.e I always say I can have guests on weekends) and if they can make it for certain time and date

 

kissing/hugging/cuddling is not the minimum but is all I expect.

 

 

It seems to me that there is a problem with having expectations of sexual (or physical, since you don't consider it such) contact with someone you call a guest. I would never invite someone in the "straight" world into my home while imposing expectations on them. Or if I did, I wouldnt call them a guest.

 

Additional Comments:

 

 

 

I don't think they are pressured in any way. I have met many in the SCs and we know each other for years (first talking in the bars, dances, sharing drinks, may be dinners too) and then they (being relatively conservative compared to escorts) accept willingly my invitation to be guests in my house and overwhelmingly very much enjoyed it and eagor to come back.

 

 

I am not a stripper so take this with a grain of salt, but it I think you need to keep in mind that the information and impressions you get from SPs of any kind will be skewed by the very fact that you are a client. No SP is likely to come out and say they feel pressured, or seem reluctant to do something that isnt thier favourite activity.

 

If you are paying them to be there, I dont consider them guests. Are they eager to go back as friends, or as paid providers?

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

I agree that the terms "hun", "dear", "sweetie", etc. can sound like fingernails on a blackboard, when used in certain contexts (even when used with the best of intents). Just thought I'd take the opportunity to post a link to Emma's excellent thread on this subject from last year:

 

http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=19431

[Old Dog 179138]

I agree that the terms "hun", "dear", "sweetie", etc. can sound like fingernails on a blackboard, when used in certain contexts (even when used with the best of intents). Just thought I'd take the opportunity to post a link to Emma's excellent thread on this subject from last year:

 

http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=19431

 

 

WIT... I must admit that when it comes to social situations, or even in correspondence, I am a huge violator of the "hun" rule. For those who have met me, if it offends I do apologize, but it is an affinity for my friends and a genuine affection that causes me to do so. With deference to both this thread and the other, those will be my last words on the topic, "bud."

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

... "bud."

 

ha ha ... you're right, Old Dog -- "bud" belongs on that list, too!

[whatsup 11893]

I admire Secret Admirer for how he conducts his encounters.

 

Any lady that meets SA will be treated like a "Princess" while they are his guest. What really could be better?

 

If SA has a personal view of having a guest over and and it is his view that he is not paying for sex, then so be it.

 

We can all have our own personal view of the hobby and what it means to us as individuals.

 

Cheers and Happy Hobbying

[Carrie Moon 68826]

Sorry but I have to chime in here once again.. what you seem to be missing whatsup.. is that it has been suggested that paying for sex makes it a bad thing.. and that offends many of us.. or that handing over cash directly instead of in an envelope might be humiliating to the receiver. That is offensive... to me at least.

 

Suggesting that if we pay for sex we might want to feel bad about it.. concerns me. Why feel bad?

 

How can you ''treat someone like a princess'' while underlying-ly criticizing what they do? being paid for sex or paying for sex? If you think it's a bad thing why are you here? It's like saying what we all do as hobbyiests or providers is something to hide and we've worked long and hard to undo that belief. It's been covered here by many ladies.. as well as many gents and I think you'll find most on here have been against that view.

 

That's the problem. We have an issue being viewed as a princess on a pedestal that can't then be treated like a person.

[Peachka 4334]

It is paying for sex. Plain & simple. To think otherwise is delusional. When guys think this way, it can lead to an emotional bonding with the SP that should not be so as it is not reciprocated & puts the SP in an uncomfortable position. Maybe the term 'GFE' is partly to blame.

 

 

Leave the envelope in plain view containing the payment as soon as you arrive. This gets that 'business' part out of the way so there is no thinking about it for the rest of the time. The SP is more at ease because it is out of the way. I have had SP's not even touch the envelope the whole time I am there. This does seem to make it less of a 'business transaction' but there has to be some level of trust first.

[Capital Hunter 18263]

I don't believe that it has been said or even suggested anywhere in the thread by anyone that pay for sex makes it a bad thing.

[Peachka 4334]

Everyone pays for sex one way or another. I don't think we can really say it is a bad thing...especially on a board like this. So nobody has said so. I understand what SA is looking for in an SP, and that is fine but not all SP's can provide it.

[Capital Hunter 18263]

Thanks Peachka.

[Reese 253]

We all have a right(personal, maybe not legal) to our perceptions, individual definitions and reasons for either indulging as a client, or choosing a career as an SP or MP. I seriously doubt, in most persons situations, that it has been with the intentions to realistically expand a social circle, make new friends or chummy acquaintances and occasional companions. I'm all for fantasy, setting a mood or ambiance, and doing my gentlemanly best in attempting to minimize the "business" aspect of an encounter. But in the end, there's a client and there's a person earning a living, and professional boundaries should be respected....whatever a client's personal intentions, requests and feelings are.

As said, fantasies are great ! But to potentially delude yourself by false feelings or impressions can be damaging both emotionally and psychologically...once outside of "the moment".

Alright, time for the doc to set his pad and pen down.....

(On a lighter note -)

I believe in it's true sense, Hugh Hefner is the only one solely paying for intended companionship, these days.

Like, c'mon! It'd take a hot tub filled with Viagra just to straighten out his pinky finger !

 

*(Heff)*: "(Huff!...urgh!:oops:) I wanna hear you scream for your Heffy, baby!"

*(Bunny)*: "Mmm(giggle)...you like it when i'm loud, Gramp..err...baby?"

*(Heff)* : "Nah, I haven't heard a fuckin' thing since the Bee-Gees!"

*(Bunny)*: "Who?"

[castle 38816]

I think it's a little column A and a little column B. I am most definitely paying for sexual services. Saying it's like a date is not really accurate in my opinion. If I had to see a SP several times before getting FS (or even a bj)....well...let's just say I probably wouldn't even see her that many times. Just picture yourself on a first encounter with a SP, your sitting on the bed talking and having a wonderful conversation, she's witty, intelligent and interesting (not to mention smoking hot!). And when you move in to get things started she stops you and says "not on the first date, I'm not that kind of girl". Wouldn't we all be a little put off to say the least? But say the same thing happens on a first date with a non SP girl, it really wouldn't be a big deal. The kinds of things that happen on a first encounter with a SP are the norm, if the same thing happens on a first date, we count ourselves extremely lucky.

 

So yes, we are paying for and expecting some kind of sexual activities when we see a SP. But that said, just the sex isn't quite enough to make it a satisfying encounter. Personality, honesty, intelligence, respect, cleanliness, hygiene and chemistry count for a lot too (for both parties involved). Personally for me, there's nothing sexier than an intelligent woman that can make me laugh, this goes for both SP and Non SP women. So I guess that aspect of the SP encounter is kind of like a date.