integrity_L 385 Report post Posted July 7, 2010 Reading thru different posting, I noticed that some providers have stated having a Boyfriend. I was wondering if they restrict their BF in the way their session finish knowing that in few hours they will see a client? I guess for myself I prefer not to know if they have a boyfriend. When I see provider I am somewhat stressed and having idea that a boyfriend may enter the apartment is an extra stress. (Ok maybe I push to far :lol:) Thanks Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lookingforfunxxx 615 Report post Posted July 7, 2010 I take it for granted that SPs have lives outside of the business. As to restricting a BF prior to working, what is the point? Most of the women see more than one client in a day. I fail to see the difference between a boyfriend going before me and another John. I have seen some SPs who have a friend hiding in the bathroom - presumably for security. Reputable ones will not have boyfirends who will interfere unecessarily if they are even present. The only time I had a boyfriend interfere was right at the start just after I had paid - I left ASAP since i felt the situation was a set up and that staying would endanger my safety. To avoid this sort of thing was the reason i joined this site. If you use a reputable SP and behave yourself you have nothing to worry about. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest *b*y Report post Posted July 7, 2010 Doesn't it make it a little sexier if she had a BF? I think for me it does.. there's something about being with another man's woman that is very sexy!:grin: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
E.D. man 691 Report post Posted July 8, 2010 Me i prefer that the SP be single and if she is not that she keep it to herself. I would feel like I am cheating and it would be uncomfotable for me. but everyones concience is different. I would not repeat with an SP who had a BF. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Megan'sTouch 23875 Report post Posted July 8, 2010 I would feel like I am cheating and it would be uncomfotable for me. This would be the equivalent of a sex worker saying "I'm not going to see any married men." I believe that a client's marital status is none of my business, unless he chooses to make it known to me, in which case I do not judge him or his marriage/relationship. Many men are more than comfortable with their female partner being a sex worker. It just comes down to clear boundaries between your personal life and your work. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
777flyer 1612 Report post Posted July 8, 2010 One of the benefits of this hobby, is I can disclose whatever personal information I wish, and the same with my lady friend..... In the end, what is personal is personal, and frankly is not my business, and as long as it doesn't impinge on the date, I am fine with that....... All the ladies have a life outside the hobby, I am not sure why that would matter much to us during the time together ? Notwithstanding of course if the BF walks in on you.....that is another story in itself....... SNK Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Reddog01 30280 Report post Posted July 8, 2010 I once booked an in-call preceded by a drink at a local bar where we met. I was unknown to her and she wanted to meet me first. I had no problem with this as I was prepared to pay for three hours and it was a good way to break the ice. When we went to her flat, during the course of conversation she mentioned that her "companion" had left for the movies until we we "done". It was also obvious that someone else lived in the flat as well. It became late and I could picture him waiting in his car on the street. Hey, I know SPs have lives and SOs, of course they do, but I have to admit I was a bit uncomfortable and it did have an affect on the atmosphere and the overall experience. Now I prefer out-calls at a hotel for that reason. It is a controlled environment and a more level playing field for both parties. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
777flyer 1612 Report post Posted July 8, 2010 I once booked an in-call preceded by a drink at a local bar where we met. I was unknown to her and she wanted to meet me first. I had no problem with this as I was prepared to pay for three hours and it was a good way to break the ice. When we went to her flat, during the course of conversation she mentioned that her "companion" had left for the movies until we we "done". It was also obvious that someone else lived in the flat as well. It became late and I could picture him waiting in his car on the street. Hey, I know SPs have lives and SOs, of course they do, but I have to admit I was a bit uncomfortable and it did have an affect on the atmosphere and the overall experience. Now I prefer out-calls at a hotel for that reason. It is a controlled environment and a more level playing field for both parties. Hey Dog, I do agree with you....... I would not be comfortable thinking the SO was outside waiting for me to finish.....Out call is where my comfort level is too...although as discussed many times on here....to each their own ! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VedaSloan 119179 Report post Posted July 9, 2010 I live with my partner and also work out of our shared living space. He's aware of what I do, so there is no dishonesty. Because of his new work schedule, he sleeps during the day, so when I book appointments, I tell him in advance that he will need to be out of the apartment for a certain amount of time. Yeah, it sucks for him that he has to interrupt his sleep so I can work, but we agreed that he would have to sometimes so that he could take this new (better) job. He keeps my cell on him and I call him when the session is finished, or when a session is extended, so he also acts as my safety net. I am also not in a place really to afford doing incalls at hotels, at least not on any regular basis. I'm sorry if this knowledge has made any of my clients uncomfortable, but I can assure you he would never burst in and he is not troubled by having to leave. He actually doesn't mind it as it gives him an excuse to go skateboarding. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Seymour 3970 Report post Posted July 9, 2010 It really should not matter if providers have a spouse or not - and to me it does not. What matters is that as a provider or entertainer you are comfortable and at ease doing what you do. When I'm with you, I'm not thinking of you with your SO as I'm sure you're not visualizing me with mine ... lol. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anika Bliss 775 Report post Posted July 9, 2010 Although it is almost common for SPs to have BFs I don't understand why they feel the need to share that information. I mean where would that come from unless the client asked? That is what I would like to know. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Megan'sTouch 23875 Report post Posted July 9, 2010 I mean where would that come from unless they asked? That is what I would like to know. When a person starts talking about their SO/kids, it's only natural to start talking about your own. That's just a guess. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nicolette Vaughn 294340 Report post Posted July 9, 2010 What I don't like is when a client will flat out ask you if you have a boyfriend or husband. IMO, this is the equivalent to being asked how much money I make every year or month as an SP. And of course then there's the million dollar question "Does he know you do this and is he okay with it?". That's a mood killer right there. I can understand if an SP mentions it in passing or if it's related to something else during general conversation but I think over time, the more an SP gets to know you, she will probably release details or her life here and there if she is comfortable with you knowing certain things. Lately, there are guys that I see for quick engagements and this never comes up because we are focused more on the encounter itself and then before you know it, the time is up. There are certain clients I that I have gotten to know that know a few small details of my life but there are others that I've seen several times if not many, many times and I still wouldn't tell them too much because they are too "private" themselves, others are just plain nosy and some guys I've seen were just too creepy for my liking. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Megan'sTouch 23875 Report post Posted July 9, 2010 I agree with Nicolette. When I was single by choice and focusing my life on work, school, and friends, I constantly heard: "How could a beautiful woman like you not have a boyfriend?" implying that if I don't have a boyfriend, it must be because I can't get one. Not all women want to be in relationships! 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
etasman2000 15994 Report post Posted July 9, 2010 I constantly heard: "How could a beautiful woman like you not have a boyfriend?" implying that if I don't have a boyfriend' date=' it must be because I can't get one. [/quote'] Hopefully they aren't implying they are hoping to be The One..... Besides in this day and age you might prefer a GF instead :-P Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Megan'sTouch 23875 Report post Posted July 9, 2010 Besides in this day and age you might prefer a GF instead :-P When I was dancing, after about the 5th or 6th "Do you have a bf? Why not?" a night, I would glare at them and say "How dare you assume I'm heterosexual! I have a girlfriend!" I think most knew I was joking, but a few thought I was being serious. And yes, a girlfriend would be nice :D Another answer I gave was "Yes, I have hundreds." I'm not normally a sarcastic person, but after being questioned 5-6 times a night why you're single, it's hard not to be! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
animal 100 Report post Posted July 9, 2010 well put megan Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest S***e Report post Posted July 9, 2010 I have a policy of not asking a lady I am visiting any questions pertaining to partners as it is clearly none of my business. Occasionally, I will tell her that I am married and I have yet to become an issue although my status is none of her concern. I would have to say that probing questions on my part are non-existent as there's many other things nicer to dwell upon. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
masterowls 249 Report post Posted July 9, 2010 well put megan Speaking for myself here. I would actually consider it a backhanded compliment to be the SO of an SP, for a few reasons. Not the least of which is, after an appointment she chooses to come home, or go out with me. I mean other guys pay her to spend time with them and here she is willingly spending valuable personal time with me... That would be a rather large ego boost. Secondly, lets face it there's more to a relationship than sex. To have an emotional connection with someone is the most valuable thing in the world, For an SP to give access to her emotions to me, that right there would be a high compliment. However, I must state here for the record, I have an ex, who dated me for 4 months before confessing she was a retired street level sexworker, who han't used protection, or been tested. I feel that any SP who has an SO, and doesn't give that person the option _right away_ to decide if they can deal with the SPs work has committed the ultimate breach of trust. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BigBlueMachine 112 Report post Posted July 10, 2010 Typically speaking as most of us are looking for discretion, I normally don't ask a lot of personal questions until I've seen someone a few times. At that point I feel a bit more comfortable and look forward to chatting with them as well. At that point it doesn't me with the SP has SO or not. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
whiteman 14028 Report post Posted July 12, 2010 Reading thru different posting, I noticed that some providers have stated having a Boyfriend. I was wondering if they restrict their BF in the way their session finish knowing that in few hours they will see a client? I guess for myself I prefer not to know if they have a boyfriend. When I see provider I am somewhat stressed and having idea that a boyfriend may enter the apartment is an extra stress. (Ok maybe I push to far :lol:) Thanks I used to feel that way when I was young and naive. But after so many years, you begin to have seen it all, and worse to live it all. If you think having a boyfriend nearby is the worst thing possible, then you haven't seen anything yet. I once saw someone, who not only had a BF, but the BF let me into the house, made sure I was comfortable, while she got ready. Then when she was ready, he went upstairs to babysit their toddlers, so that none of them woke up and began crying or anything in the middle of it, while you were downstairs with her. And worse still, the BF is himself an SP who is bi, and has been with some of your gay friends. You ain't seen anything yet, kid. :lol: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Megan'sTouch 23875 Report post Posted July 12, 2010 I used to feel that way when I was young and naive. But after so many years, you begin to have seen it all, and worse to live it all. If you think having a boyfriend nearby is the worst thing possible, then you haven't seen anything yet. I once saw someone, who not only had a BF, but the BF let me into the house, made sure I was comfortable, while she got ready. Then when she was ready, he went upstairs to babysit their toddlers, so that none of them woke up and began crying or anything in the middle of it, while you were downstairs with her. And worse still, the BF is himself an SP who is bi, and has been with some of your gay friends. You ain't seen anything yet, kid. :lol: Great story! On my my clients told me a story from 30 years ago when he used to pick up ladies off the street before figuring out the escort thing. He picked up a lady off the street and she directed him back to her home. When they he got inside, she introduced him to her father, mother, and children. Her parents were over to babysit her little kids while she worked. He said "Hi Mom! Hi Dad! Hi Kids!" and then went off to do his business. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VedaSloan 119179 Report post Posted July 13, 2010 I used to feel that way when I was young and naive. But after so many years, you begin to have seen it all, and worse to live it all. If you think having a boyfriend nearby is the worst thing possible, then you haven't seen anything yet. I once saw someone, who not only had a BF, but the BF let me into the house, made sure I was comfortable, while she got ready. Then when she was ready, he went upstairs to babysit their toddlers, so that none of them woke up and began crying or anything in the middle of it, while you were downstairs with her. And worse still, the BF is himself an SP who is bi, and has been with some of your gay friends. You ain't seen anything yet, kid. :lol: Am I the only one who thinks that is fucking awesome?! Props to that dude. You rule. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
whiteman 14028 Report post Posted July 13, 2010 Am I the only one who thinks that is fucking awesome?! Props to that dude. You rule. Well, it would've been even more awesome, if the guy was semi-competent with the kids. There were a few occasions where the kid started crying, and the guy couldn't handle him, so we had to stop the session so that mom can go upstairs to put him to sleep properly. Didn't cost me anything, but I had to come back another day. :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VedaSloan 119179 Report post Posted July 14, 2010 Well, it would've been even more awesome, if the guy was semi-competent with the kids. There were a few occasions where the kid started crying, and the guy couldn't handle him, so we had to stop the session so that mom can go upstairs to put him to sleep properly. Didn't cost me anything, but I had to come back another day. :) Hmm, well that is a bummer. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites