Choosing an SP who genuinely enjoys what she does for a living.

[Seymour 3970]

I believe the intent of the OP was good, it is just the points came out provocative, thus alienating some members. In his defense though, twice in the post he asked us readers if we think his points are realistic.

 

Whether we agree or disagree with the member's ideas, let's remember that every hobbyist is different. Everyone has their criteria for whom they want to see, and what they expect out of the experience, and chances are the escort 'truly enjoying what she does' is important for the OP. Let's remember too that not every encounter is physical - some people do enjoy a cerebral type of date, not everyone plays the field, some just want to find a provider they connect with and see that person on an ongoing basis.

 

Based on the OP's profile, his interest is massage and I suspect he wants to venture with an escort and like a lot of people new to this aspect of sexual fulfillment, the mechanics of the date gets more focus - rather than the actual date.

[RobX 2084]

I am the OP of this thread. Given the nature of the replies to the thread, I now realize that I should NOT have included my list of suggestions in my post, but should have left the question more open-ended instead. However, I did learn some valuable lessons from the experience:

 

1. When posting, sometimes less information is better. I included my list of suggestions to clarify my question and to start the discussion. However, my list of suggestions seems to have become the focus of the discussion, diverting attention from my original question.

 

2. I recognize now that my suggestions were based on assumptions and broad generalizations, as pointed out in several of the replies. I did try to validate my assumptions by asking if my suggestions were realistic. However, my suggestions seem to have raised so many red flags that they obscured the questions I was asking.

 

3. I realize now that before posting my list of suggestions I should have stopped to consider whether my statements had the potential to offend anyone. It is the first time on CERB that I have been on the receiving end of such a hostile reaction. As well, it seemed that some the harshest posts were the some of those which garnished the most nominations. That was rather disheartening. Of course, to be fair, I realize that the nominations were not necessarily made to second their harsh tone but rather because of the other extremely valid statements

contained in those posts.

 

After reviewing my list, I now realize that I may have unwittingly provoked the reactions I received, and that the reactions were quite understandable under the circumstances. Therefore, for having, however unintentionally, made statements that may have offended someone, I SINCERELY APOLOGIZE to all those who I may have offended - all SPs who work for an agency, or who have worked for an agency in the past, all SPs under the age of 25, all SPs who are not GFE, all SPs who ever been late or had to cancel (as can happen to anyone) and all SPs who resent being "psychoanalysed ". Essentially, I apologize to all SPs on CERB.

 

Having said all that, I do acknowledge and thank the many posters who did, in fact, provide valuable answers to my original question, in particular the following:

 

If you want to make sure she is loving her job, how about ... just treating her like a lady... show her a good time and enjoy yourself.. if she wasn't loving her job the moment before, she will when you make her job easy by being a good client and treating her with the respect she deserves.

 

Just a brief suggestion since you asked. Treat her with full respect. Make her feel safe welcomed attractive and loved and treasured, then regardless of any of above items in your list there is a good chance that she would enjoy what she does genuinely, at least while she is with you.

 

... the key for the SP to enjoy the appointment is you being respectful and communication prior the encounter and a little research (posts, recommendations) may make a difference as you can sense the vibe of who you'll meet.

 

To anyone still reading, thank you very much for your patience.

[Parker 19761]

After reviewing my list, I now realize that I may have unwittingly provoked the reactions I received, and that the reactions were quite understandable under the circumstances. Therefore, for having, however unintentionally, made statements that may have offended someone, I SINCERELY APOLOGIZE to all those who I may have offended - all SPs who work for an agency, or who have worked for an agency in the past, all SPs under the age of 25, all SPs who are not GFE, all SPs who ever been late or had to cancel (as can happen to anyone) and all SPs who resent being "psychoanalysed ". Essentially, I apologize to all SPs on CERB.

 

 

I do very much appreciate your apology and understand that you didn't mean anything negative by it, or think it would have the reaction it did.

 

I was hoping I didn't come off to harsh, I wasn't trying to.. I was trying to convey the frustration we can constantly face with being treated different and with having to defend ourselves when it comes to all sorts of things.

 

Honestly though, look around at the ladies here on Cerb... their posts, the recommendations.. I don't think any hints or tricks are necessary to find a lady who enjoys what she does. ;-)

[Royalfun 55449]

I am the OP of this thread. Given the nature of the replies to the thread, I now realize that I should NOT have included my list of suggestions in my post, but should have left the question more open-ended instead. (...)

Having said all that, I do acknowledge and thank the many posters who did, in fact, provide valuable answers to my original question, (...)

 

To anyone still reading, thank you very much for your patience.

 

I want to salute the humility of "MyPleasure" in this thread;l his apologies reflects what the CERB community is. I find that the issue he raised is relevant and has produced very fruitful reactions.

 

I learned also a lot about "posting" and to think about the people reading it. At the same time, when a topic is addressing to the quality of relationship that we expect from a SP, it's a very delicate matter because it's in the core of the business of "service providing".

 

On the main subject, my thinking is that it's difficult to be sure that the SP enjoys what she is doing; it's like real life, and it is, some days you like it, some days you don't.

Firstly, what really matters for me, it's that the SP do her job freely, without constraint, and that she choose to do it. Then, the real bonus is that I can connect with her and where I feel a certain relationship.

 

The issue of "does she enjoys it or not" is a large question. Maybe in general, she enjoys it, but this time with this client, she does not. Maybe in general she does not enjoy it, but with this specific customer, she had a ball. Sometimes, it's obvious, sometimes not.

For me, my criteria is more the chemistry that leads my decision to repeat or not. I try to listen to the SP and to my feelings, and I can see if she likes it or not with me.

 

And since I am in this hobby, I met many wonderful ladies of all ages with great enjoyments. And I feel privileged to be part of this community.

[Carrie Moon 68826]

I think the ''analysis'' of trying to find the right sp for your encounter is much like trying to be sure you have the exact right formula for a ''good time'' whether it be finding the perfect night out at a restaurant or a vacation..

 

You can research up the wazzoo.. and I do when I vacation but not so much when I go to a restaurant. Even when you do the best research on a vacation.. it may be a 5 star. I may have won awards for the best restaurant reviews, best beaches, best nightlife shows etc. but then your plane is late arriving.. it rains everyday.. you get food poisoning, etc etc etc.. and you think what the heck? I planned for everything and I still had a rotten time.

 

On the other hand.. you wing it.. and just go by feel and backpack through your journey meeting stranger after stranger and adventure after adventure. (I've done both but frankly prefer all-inclusive as I get older..lol)

 

The important factor in any experience is that you go by feel/your gut. You can't plan for everything. Learn to listen to your instincts and enjoy it as it comes.

 

The most difficult time I have with clients are the ones who are too much in their heads.. there's absolutely nothing I can do about that if they are because they are alone in there. I'm not necessarily saying this is you.. but it's just a caution.

 

I think your generalizations are good ''in general'' but as you've found out.. many don't fit into that category. ie.. the ones I've seen pimped were generally the younger ones.. I don't know any girls in my age group who are pimped. Having said that.. I'm sure there are..somewhere.

 

I very very highly recommend you go by instinct and feel.. how? by reading a girls posts on here since you have a large pool on cerb to view from.. and reading recommendations. Ignore whether she's in an agency or her age as a factor unless of course you have a preference.

[Royalfun 55449]

I think the ''analysis'' of trying to find the right sp for your encounter is much like trying to be sure you have the exact right formula for a ''good time'' whether it be finding the perfect night out at a restaurant or a vacation..

 

You can research up the wazzoo.. and I do when I vacation but not so much when I go to a restaurant. Even when you do the best research on a vacation.. it may be a 5 star. I may have won awards for the best restaurant reviews, best beaches, best nightlife shows etc. but then your plane is late arriving.. it rains everyday.. you get food poisoning, etc etc etc.. and you think what the heck? I planned for everything and I still had a rotten time.

 

On the other hand.. you wing it.. and just go by feel and backpack through your journey meeting stranger after stranger and adventure after adventure. (I've done both but frankly prefer all-inclusive as I get older..lol)

 

The important factor in any experience is that you go by feel/your gut. You can't plan for everything. Learn to listen to your instincts and enjoy it as it comes.

 

The most difficult time I have with clients are the ones who are too much in their heads.. there's absolutely nothing I can do about that if they are because they are alone in there. I'm not necessarily saying this is you.. but it's just a caution.

 

I think your generalizations are good ''in general'' but as you've found out.. many don't fit into that category. ie.. the ones I've seen pimped were generally the younger ones.. I don't know any girls in my age group who are pimped. Having said that.. I'm sure there are..somewhere.

 

I very very highly recommend you go by instinct and feel.. how? by reading a girls posts on here since you have a large pool on cerb to view from.. and reading recommendations. Ignore whether she's in an agency or her age as a factor unless of course you have a preference.

 

Carrie, what you say is full of wisdom. Since I'm here, when I want to experience a new SP, my choices are based on the recs, the posts and my feelings. And when I repeat, it's was based on the chemistry and the pleasure I had during the encounter.

 

Any analysis has a part of speculation, and to find if somebody "enjoys" and at what level, is something that takes time to find. My time with a SP is a moment where I let my "head" outside, and choose to live my feelings without reservation; it's a moment of fun, of discovery, a real gift, that I try to enjoy fully.